#it's gotta be to go get cassian again right

[azsazz]

Shut Out

Hockey!Azriel x Figure Skater!Reader

Summary: Req from @i-am-a-lost-girl16: Hockey Az and Figure Skater reader?

Warnings: N/A

Word Count: 1,493

Notes: See? I still write 😏

_________________________________________

“Hey! I still have the ice for another fifteen minutes,” you shout at the hockey players that are suddenly stampeding through the gate to the ice rink like animals.

You cut to a harsh stop, ice shavings spraying in your wake as you cross your arms over your chest and glare at the Velaris Bats hockey team gliding easily across the ice rink where you were just practicing your figure skating routine. Normally, you’d be ogling the broad players in their onyx and violet practice jerseys, already splitting into teams for a scrimmage as they ignore the fiery look on your face, but with only a few more weeks until nationals, you need every minute on the ice that you can get.

“Sorry, Princess,” Cassian “Bloodshed” Bailey says, flipping a puck onto the tip of his stick as he skates past, tossing it up and catching it again a few times as if it’s a display that should impress you. Right now, none of their tricks or flirtatious teases are doing anything of the sort. “Gotta big game against the Wolves this weekend. Coach wants us on extra ice time so we’re in tip-top shape.”

“I’m pretty sure when he said extra ice time, he didn’t mean to interrupt my ice time,” you growl at him, but he’s already distracted, bobbing the puck back and forth as he approaches the net. The sound of his stick on the ice echoes throughout the arena as he takes a slap shot.

You refrain from smiling smugly when the goalie stops his shot with a triumphant cackle.

You stubbornly want to stay on the ice, take up the time you’re allowed to practice your routine, but with all the pucks zipping around, it could be detrimental to your health if you were to trip or—Mother forbid—land on one as you come out of an axel.

Eyes flitting angrily around the colony of Bat’s players, you scour the ice for the team captain, Rhysand. The thing is, all dressed up in their pads and helmets, the players are a blur of clones, whipping by you on both sides as they warm up.

There’s always one player that never fails to stand out to you, no matter how much he tries to disappear from the crowd. He catches your eye as he skates by, the fallen strands of hair from your ponytail lifting with the speed that he’s moving, taking a puck down the ice as a breakaway ensues.

He dodges you easily, and your heart races in your chest at the fleeting glance he passes you. His hazel eyes have a hard, determined set to them, as if he knows before he’s even finished crossing the neutral line that he’s going to score a goal.

Azriel Teller.

He dips around the defensemen effortlessly, and if you were more well-versed in hockey to know if he was actually as good as he seems, you’d be sure that he’s a shoo-in for going to the big leagues after graduation.

Azriel feigns to the right, deking out the player in the violet practice jersey, before placing a well-aimed shot at the net.

It soars past the goalie, hitting the net and falling to the ice with a clatter that’s deafened by his teammates cheering and skating his way to clang their helmets together in celebration.

From the middle of the player puddle, those glittering hazel eyes find yours again and your breath whooshes from your chest at the smirk he pairs with it.

“(Y/N?) What are you still doing out here?” A voice startles you away from the glorious sight of Azriel. You flinch, teetering off balance as you whirl around, flailing your arms as you startle.

Rhysand catches you as you slip, steadying you against his chest. The sound of his hockey stick slapping the ice is loud in your ears and your cheeks heat with embarrassment as you clutch to the captain of the Velaris Bats jersey with an iron grip.

You were nearly born on the ice, your parents getting you into skating at a very early age, and here you are, tripping around like a newborn deer walking for the first time.

All in front of Azriel, too.

When you have your feet beneath you again, you slide back a pace, the frown returning to your face as you tilt your chin to address Rhysand.

“Your team cut into my time early,” you say sourly, but standing this close to Rhysand, you can’t seem to find that fire in the pit of your stomach that raged when the team first stepped onto the ice. The goal Azriel all but dedicated to you with that look snuffed it right out. “I don’t appreciate you guys barging in here on my time, thinking you own the damn place. I have nationals to practice for, you know.”

Rhysand grimaces in response. He’s someone you might even consider a friend, having run into the hockey boys on multiple occasions, the figure skaters and the hockey teams having to share one rink now that the other one is finally being updated with the generous donation the school received. He’s nice, a good team captain, if you’ve ever seen one, caring not only about his players, but the circumstances everyone at the Velaris Ice Center is facing with recent construction.

“I’m sorry about that,” he says, and he means it. “I was in a call with coach and wasn’t able to stop Cassian from leading the charge out here.”

“This is the second time it’s happened in two weeks, Rhys.” You all but huff. You don’t want to act like the prissy figure skater they probably all think you are, but enough is enough. Winning Nationals is important to you, and you can’t become distracted by hockey players or lose any ice time.

Rhysand opens his mouth to reply but before he can say anything, Azriel is whizzing past, shoulder checking his captain as if the consequences of that don’t bother him in the slightest.

You gasp as Rhys recoils, even more so when you see the cross look on Azriel’s face when he shoots a warning glower over his shoulder.

Rhys glares, flipping his friend off, and you have to tuck your lips between your teeth to keep from bursting into laughter at the sight of his gloved fingers thick with padding flipping Azriel off.

Rolling his eyes, the captain turns back to you.

“What was that all about?” You ask tentatively, not sure you want to know the answer. Your eyes are still on Azriel who’s hopped over the fence into the team’s bench and is currently squirting some water into his mouth. It drips down his chin, gliding down the thick column of his throat and into the neckline of his pads.

The sight makes your throat dry.

“I’ll try better,” Rhysand says, hands on his hips as he looks around the rink. His perfectly plucked brows are furrowed as he thinks, and you can’t help but wonder if he gets them professionally done or not. “Hey, assholes,” he suddenly shouts, and you flinch when his voice echoes around the arena. “Get on the benches, now!”

You swallow the lump that’s forming in your throat as the team follows their captains’ orders with grumbles. They don’t seem to want whatever lecture they think they’re going to get from Rhysand, but he ignores their grousing, turning back to you when the last ass has hit the bench.

“You have fifteen minutes, (Y/N),” Rhys says, skating backwards towards the bench.  When your jaw drops, his grin turns wicked.

He wants you to finish practicing right now? While the entire team watches? Is he fucking crazy?

“You can’t be serious,” you shriek, almost stomping your skate-clad foot on the ice. Yes, you’re used to performing in front of a crowd even larger than the team, but these guys are like fiends. Half of them glower at you while the other half is looking at you like they want to fool around on center ice.

“Totally am,” Rhysand shouts back, and you’re pretty sure your cheeks are hot enough to melt the ice beneath your skates. “C’mon now, you’re wasting precious practice time for the both of us!”

“Fuck you,” you grumble, but he’s right, you do want your time back. Preferably without a horde of horny college hockey players watching you, but you’ll take what you can get this time.

Skating over to where your phone is placed on the rail of the away team benches, you restart your song with a few beats of silence before so you can get into your starting position back in the middle of the rink.

When the first string of the violins starts, you’re off, determined now more than ever at getting this routine perfect.

You’re all too aware of the hazel eyes tracing your every move as you skate, though.

[acotarxreader]

Tease

Azriel x Reader

Synopsis: Friends with benefits is quickly running its course between you and Azriel with Mor's birthday party being the perfect setting to see which of you will cave first.

Warnings: Fluff, teasing, flirty

A/N: hope you enjoy this lil Az fic. I have an Eris one written but I think it needs some reworking that I don't have the energy for right now.

---------------------------------------------

“Az, have you seen my left shoe?” You scanned the room, hands on your hips as Azriel watched you from his bed, the sheet haphazardly covering his lower half. He reached his arm from behind his head to retrieve the quickly discarded shoe from behind his bedside lamp, throwing it towards you. 

“Don’t look at me like that” You laughed, firing it back towards his smug face, a laugh leaving him as you narrowly missed his dishevelled hair. 

“Get up Az, we gotta go to Ritas” he groaned in reply, pulling the covers over his face in hopes of blocking out the world. The evening you had spent together, much like the majority of them, had been impromptu and the two of you prepared yourselves to pull yourselves back together as if none of the previous time spent together had happened. 

“YNN, I’m tired go without me” he muffled through the cotton.

“I bet you are tired” You chuckled, Azriel quickly darting forward from under the sheet to pull you into his chest and back into the sheets of his bed. He nipped your neck playfully as you left your laughs come hard and fast, his legs knotting into yours as he hovered above you. You suddenly pushed him backwards before tapping against the side of your head gently, your code to one another that Rhysand was demanding the attention of your mind.

Azriel looked down towards you, examining your smiling face as it reacted to the words his brothers spoke that he wasn’t privy to. His eyes traced along the lovingly created smile lines decorating your face, down your neck and along your body before resting his eyes once again on yours as they sparkled for him. He could spend all day looking into them. This very thought struck Azriel hard, were feelings starting to move beyond friends with benefits? He fought the chill running across his wings, uncomfortable with the thought of allowing himself to push past the denial. Azriel pulled from you quickly, his ankle snagging on yours sending him colliding with the floor with a thud. You looked down at him on the floor, fighting the urge to burst with laughter as he scurried to get ready for Mor’s birthday party, bruised ego and tailbone in tow.

—--------------------------------------

Rita’s crowd grew and grew until fae practically flooded the street. The Inner Circle found their home in their usual booth, the joy radiating from around the well-worn table. Mor worked her way through the room, the birthday party of her dreams filling her with such utter feelings of home. 

“Do you know anyone besides us in here?” Elain shouted over the booming crowd to Azriel who laughed into the neck of his beer as he nodded. His foot gently tapped Rhysand’s shin beneath the table, waking the sleepy High Lord from his rest. 

“Sorry, Nyx is going through sleep regression” He yawned out, Cassian passing him another drink that he quickly liberated from the crystal. Azriel smiled, Nesta pulling Elain from his side to dance with her, Mor quickly filling the empty seat. 

“It’s exhausting being this popular” she beamed, taking Cassian’s drink from him and finishing it off. 

“Hey!”

“My birthday, my drink-” she grinned “-go get another one, Rhys is paying the tab”

“Rhys is doing what?” The High Lord laughed through a rogue yawn in reply.

“You said so, right before Cassian saved your sleep-deprived face from hitting your plate at dinner” The playful argument started to grow, Azriel smiling along before panning his eyes across the room to find the easiest way to the bar top. His gaze getting stuck on you resting your back against the oak, drinking from a tall glass while waiting for Feyre to finish her order. Cassian followed his brother's gaze from across the table, the grin knitting deeply across his face. 

“So Azzie, tell me, when are you and YN gonna stop pretending it's just sex and actually just sign the marriage licence, it's been like 7 months” 

"N-o no no" He managed to choke out between rapid taps to the back from Mor.

“Cass, don’t kill YN’s plaything off” Mor quipped while watching the colour return back to Azriel’s face.

“I’m not her plaything, maybe she’s mine” Azriel offered, trying to deflect. 

"And who exactly could you be talking about like that" Your voice had Azriel wishing his beer had just finished him off.

"Y/N, we were just messing with him"

"Ah yes, Cassy because I love when my sex life is the topic of conversation amongst my friends, although I suppose you've nothing going on in your own lives-" you blinked down at your friends "-And how is Nesta?" you added, Cassian sunk on the seat with a groan "-And that female from the continent?" sending Mor sliding too, leaving Azriel grinning to himself. 

“Well that's my cue to get more alcohol” Mor made her quick exit, allowing you to find your usual space next to Azriel in the booth, Feyre sitting in alongside Rhysand and Cassian. A pang of jealousy beat through Azriel as Feyre kissed Rhysands cheek sweetly, the open display of affection something he could never master. He shook his head gently to take the feeling away before realising his arm had instinctively found its way to behind you on the back of the bench. Shadows traced along your palm beneath the table, Azriel noticing his smokey friends curling into you naturally. He smiled down at them causing you to meet his eye with your own grin. Warmth spread through the Ilyrian as if you were the only person in the room. Azriel turned the feeling cold in his veins, pushing it to where he couldn’t reach with ease, his arm darting back to his side. 

“Are you alright Az?”

“Yeah!” Azriel shot back far too quickly to be casual and then stood suddenly, bumping the table and pulling the focus of the table towards him. You slid out to release him from the booth without further comment, the four of you watching him like a runaway animal as he found his way to the bar. Your three friends tore their eyes from Azriel and looked at you, with coordinated confusion. 

“Okay okay” You raised your hands up to chest height and then slid out to follow your closest friend. Azriel swallowed the drink he received whole before rapidly ordering another before the bartender could go too far from him.

“Az, what’s going on?” your voice gave him a small fright from his thoughts. 

“I uhh” Was all he could manage as he turned to face you, his eyes landing on Feyre and Rhysand as she pulled her mate to dance with her alongside her sisters. You followed his sightline towards the group where it landed on Nesta as the couple crossed her path.

“Nesta? Really?” You shuffled on the spot, fighting away the sound of jealous annoyance before it could rise in your throat. 

“No I was...wait does that make you jealous?” he couldn't force down his signature smirk and you hit him in the chest. 

“No I just... it's just stop staring at your friends mate like that” 

“You are jealous”

“I am not” your arms folded into your chest tightly, trying to drag your eyes to anywhere but the smirk.

“So I could ask her out and you’d be totally fine with it?”

“Well I mean Cassian might have something to say” He rolled his eyes as you stole his drink from the bar top, taking a swig. Azriel enjoyed the sight of your usual coolness escaping you and decided to have some fun with it. 

“Well okay what about...what about if I asked Cresseida out?” he scanned the room to find the person that would annoy you most and it was definitely her. You ran your tongue across your teeth before taking another deep drink.

“Yeah- yes that would be fi-okay” you said through gritted teeth, hitting the glass back down off the mahogany with white knuckles. Cresseida and you had had numerous run-ins during your role as emissary to the seasonal courts. Your defence of Cassian and his love of blowing things up was the catalyst to shatter the already fragile alliance you had. Her presence at Mor’s birthday party was an olive branch to the Summer Court.

He nodded at you before pushing off the bar and sauntering over to the pool table where Cresseida was. A distraction from you as well as a way for him to make you want him more, win-win in his books he thought. 

You white-knuckled the fresh tumbler of whiskey in your hand, seething energy out as you watched Azriel dazzle Cresseida. Mor joined your side just as the crystal began to crack in your palm. 

“Getting crushed by the crush YNN?” 

“Leave it Mor” She rolled her eyes at you before speaking again.

“You know he's only talking with her to annoy you yeah? He never shuts up about you, he’s definitely in his feelings”

“Really?”

“Yeah, c’mon YNN, the way he looks at you is enough to confirm anything” You pursed your lips before a smile grew across them. Feelings were never part of the deal but this was new information that made you feel so incredibly fuzzy.

“That, that I can work with” you winked at your best friend before heading to the bathroom.

You returned to Azriel’s side moments later, standing very close after he took his shot, Cresseida’s stare heating you from across the pool table.

“Are you okay YNN? Something wrong?” he stood up from his stance and leaned against the pool stick with his famous smirk painted on. Cresseida watched you carefully before lining up her own shot.

“No no, nothing” Your hand ran down his side and into his front pocket causing him to jump slightly. You then slowly slipped your now empty hand back out before winking and walking away slowly, knowing he was watching.

Cresseida took her shot while Azriel put his hand into his pocket, his eyes widened immediately at the feeling of a lacy thong balled up in the fabric. Azriel’s eyes shot to you while you leaned against the bar and gave him a small little wave with just your fingertips before you took up another drink in your hand and sat back into the booth with your friends. Azriel made an empty apology to the Princess of the Summer before practically running back to the booth, sliding in alongside you once again.

 “You think that's cute?” he whispered under his breath to you when the conversation around you two got too loud for anyone to hear you both. You just took another sip through your smirk. A shadow slipped from around your ankle, up along your thigh beneath the table, tracing the lining of your skirt before slipping beneath the fabric. Your body jolted forward at the sensation of the delicate wicked touch, the table looked at you briefly before turning their attention back to Feyre’s story. 

“Push in!” Nesta half demanded to the two of you as she and Elain had finally had their fill of dancing while Mor squished in alongside Feyre, Rhysand and Cassian.

“We should get another chair” Rhysand suggested. 

“Don’t be silly” You smiled at him, a smile Azriel knew had a deeper meaning. You stood slightly in the booth before planting yourself on top of Azriel’s lap, the two sisters now happy to fill the space. This new configuration suited everyone but Azriel and as the conversation grew back to its joyous loud volume you couldn’t help but push further into the Spymaster. You felt him grow beneath you, your skirt riding up a little at your subtle movement, Azriel gripped the seat of the booth containing his growing imagination. 

“Yeah he would be perfect for YNN!” The mention of your name in the conversation brought the two of you back to earth. Mor had had enough of watching the games between you and she had a bet to win with Cassian.

“Who would?”

“Yeah who? Who would be perfect for her?” Azriel hadn’t meant to come off as bitter as he had and you tried your best to not laugh. 

“This wonderful male from Day, he sounds perfect for you YN”

“Sounds great, give me his det-AILS” you squealed slightly as Azriel squeezed your thigh beneath the table. 

“Hey YN, I should bring you home, remember you said you didn’t not to stay out too late because you have that big meeting in the morning with Summer?”

“No I don't remember th-AT” You threw a dirty look as he squeezed your leg again.

“Oh wait yes, I do remember that” Nesta huffed at your reply, having to stand again to let the two of you out of the booth. You both wished Mor a happy birthday before leaving almost as quickly as you came, Mor putting out her palm to receive her bet money from Cassian. 

—-----------------------------

Azriel sat at the foot of his bed as he watched you collect your things from around his studio apartment, all done in complete silence. 

“See you later Az” You rushed your words out, hands full of various artefacts as you went for the front door. Azriel cut your course off, you bumping gently into his chest. 

“Are you going to make contact with that male Mor was talking about?” His clipped tone coated you. 

“I don’t know” You raised an eyebrow, his hand taking hold of your wrist before you could reach for the door behind him. 

“Well…what if you didn’t?”

“Then I’d still be single”

“What if you weren't single?”

“Azriel” You pulled from him and threw your stuff down on the kitchen table before taking up your favourite spot on his couch, Azriel joining your side soon after.

“So do you wanna be together or not Az?! I can't take these mixed messages”

“I don't know!”

“WELL FIGURE IT OUT” Your voice got away from you, making him shuffle in his seat, his own voice escaping him-

“I DON’T KNOW I DON'T KNOW! ALL I KNOW IS I DON'T WANT YOU WITH ANY OTHER MALE”

“AND I DON'T WANT YOU WITH ANY OTHER FEMALE SO WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!” he caught your face suddenly pulling you into him, his tongue tracing the inside of your mouth almost viciously, you pulled him further on top of you.

“No no no Az this doesn't solve anything!” You pushed him into the chest away from you.

“But this is how we always solve things”

“And maybe that's not working anymore” you said quietly as he retreated back again.

“Yeah, maybe it isn't… what are we gonna do?”

“What do you wanna do?”

“What if-what if we just saw each other” It took all that he was to rip his eyes from the carpet and say that to your face “-I-mean-I mean if you wan-t to I mean we don-t have to” 

“Okay”

“Okay?”

“Yeah” You beamed, Azriel matched your wide smile, instantly pressing you back into the couch to hover above you. You ran a hand down his face before his kissed you gently

“Az what happens if this doesn't work?”

“What happened if it does?” Your only reply was to kiss him once again, the first of the rest of your lives.

------------------------------------

What do you think???

[thehighladywrites]

ACOTAR MEN X READER, “HE’S THE BEST BROTHER EVER”

ᡣ𐭩 summary: you prank them based on this | prank link

ᡣ𐭩 warnings: nsfw in cassian’s, crack

ᡣ𐭩 amara’s note: help this was so fun to make thank you for the req anon | based on this request

⊹ RHYSAND

"Rhys, come here! I'm making a cute video of us."

He practically runs to you, ensuring his clothes are smoothed out and his hair is laid to perfection.

You step back when you press the record button and then get closer to him, putting your hand on his abs.

"You see this man?" you say with an extra dose of possessiveness in your voice. "Yeah, if you wanna get to him, you have to go through me first."

Rhys looks down at you with a smirk, nodding proudly at the fact that you're claiming him for everyone to see.

Your hands travel from his abs to his neck as you bring him down for a long, sweet kiss.

He grabs your hips, pulling you closer for a heated makeout session, but you pull back before he can take it further

“He’s the best big brother ever in this world.”

Rhys immediately lets go of you, taking a step back with a horrified look before he desperately looks into the camera, then back to you, who can't keep from laughing.

"Out of all your practical jokes, this has got to be the worst one ever," Rhys protests, shaking his head. "No, I'm not her brother. We're mated, and what we do is very far away from sibling stuff."

He says the last bit to the camera with a broad smile, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

⊹ AZRIEL

"What should I say, sweetheart?" Azriel asks

"Nothing, Az. Just stand there and let me do the work," you reply affectionately.

"I've heard that one before," he says with a cocky grin.

You roll your eyes, suppressing a smile, as you press the record button.

He immediately draws closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist. You smile up at him, mischief hidden behind your eyes.

“This man is mine, and if you want to get to him, you gotta go through me first, right?”

Azriel is filled with cringe and makes this face😲

“Oh! Um, yeah. That’s right.” he says, voice too high

Listen, he loves you but he is wondering how the fuck you’re not criniging out rn too. Like are you serious?

You squish his cheeks together and plant a dramatic, loud kiss on his lips.

“He is the best big brother ever.”

Azriel smiles, leaning in to kiss you again while casting a glance at the camera.

“No, she’s the best little sister ever.”

Your jaw drops at the sudden twist; he has stolen your prank.

“Damn it Az, you can’t let me have one thing?”

He shrugs, “Says the one with the incest prank.”

⊹ CASSIAN

“Cassie, just stand there, i’m going to record us. You don’t have to do anything, okay?”

“Alright, baby.”

You see Cassian behind you checking out your ass through the camera as you press record, backing into him

“Just a PSA, this is my man and if you wanna get to him, you gotta go through me first.” you said exaggerated with your hands on your hips before kissing him deeply

He smirked suspiciously before soaking up your posessivness. But before you could say your other line, he picked you up with one arm, throwing you over his sturdy shoulder as he walked over to your bed

“Wha- Cassian, we were recording!”

“Okay, we can keep recording. Make a fun little video, just the two of us.” he said with a low, lustfilled voice.

You didn’t even bother continuing the prank as you nodded, intrigued by making a whole different sort of video

You just prank him another time, right now you need big dick hot guy general massive wingspan big tattooed arms deep voice nice abs pullable hair daddy cassian (real asf)

⊹ LUCIEN

He already knows what you’re going to do but he plays along

You tug him to stand infront of your camera

The way he looks at you, makes you want to laugh but you bite your tongue

You pull him in closer by his forearm, holding him as you look into the camera

“This is my man so if you want him you will have to go though me first.”

Lucien supresses his smile at your attempt at a joke

“Yeah, you heard her,” he nods determined at the screen

You then pull him down and just as you’re about to kiss him you burst out laughing

Lucien tilts his down at you in mock confusion

“Is something funny? I thought i was the best brother ever, laughing at me isn’t very nice.”

Your eyes widen at him, jaw dropped. “No way, Luc, you knew?”

“Baby, i’m as chronically online as you are.”

⊹ ERIS

“What is this for?”

“For me, please just stand there and we’ll be good to go.”

He is a bit skeptical but listens nonetheless

“Very well. Go on, love.”

You press record and start the prank

“Hi guys, i just wanted to let you know that this is my man and if you ever wanna get to him you gotta go through me first.”

Eris looks at you a bit weird. He can’t take you seriously. The epitome of this face 😬

You grab his face and press a kiss to his lips. Eris warms at the action, smiling at you before his smile drop instantly

“He’s the best big brother ever.”

His entire face sours, a look of absolute disgust portraying his face.

“That right there is some Night Court shit.”

With that he simply leaves but not before scrunching his face in disbelief, sighing in disappointment

🏷️: @artists-ally @thelov3lybookworm @riddlesb1tch @berryzxx @clairebear08 @cupidojenphrodite @redbleedingrose @fell-in-luvs

[riddlesb1tch]

Being Mated to Cassian

Cassian x reader

summary: a bunch of scenarios of what its like to be mated to Cassian

warnings: none!

I feel like Cassian’s the kind of guy you’d have a best-friend's relationship with. Let me explain. Starting in the morning:

You glanced at the clock then at your mate still snoring soundly in bed and sighed. You and Cassian were supposed to be at the Townhouse in thirty minutes yet this male was still asleep. Rolling your eyes, you marched up to the bed. Cassian looked so peaceful laying on his side, face partially buried in the pillow, and hair swept over his face. What you were feeling at the moment looking at him might even be mistaken for adoration. You picked up a pillow and slammed it on Cassian’s face.   “Ow!” Cassian screamed, sitting upright in bed. “What was that for?” he asked.  “Get up! It's 12. We need to be at the Townhouse by 12:30!” you said and walked towards the closet to get ready.  Cassian groaned loudly, plopping back into bed. “5 more minutes,” he mumbled. Just as he was about to slip back into that peaceful slumber, you grabbed his shoulder to turn him onto his back and captured his lips into a kiss. Now he’s definitely awake.  You pulled away for a second and said, “Good morning,” then kissed him again.  “What are you doing? I haven’t even brushed my teeth yet,” he said.  You smiled. “I don’t care,” and kissed him one last time before pulling him up and out of bed. 

When Cassian gets injured and you’re tending to his wounds: 

He’s sitting in a chair while you’re perched on his lap, inspecting the gash on his wing near his shoulder that he got during training with Azriel. Your concerned frown already tells him that you’re upset he wasn’t more careful.  “Y/n, I’m fine,” he says but he’s quieted by one look from you. You pick up the antiseptic-soaked cotton and gently dab it onto the wound. Cassian hisses from the burning, eliciting a mumbled apology from you. You hold his face gently with one hand, thumb stroking back and forth on his cheek in a comforting gesture. He looks up at you with utter adoration, completely enamoured by your gentle and loving yet strict nature.  Finally, when you’re done, you look into Cassian’s eyes and find some of the anger dissipating.  You smile, gently holding his face between and kissing his forehead. Cassian leans into you, closing his eyes in comfort. You loop your arms around his neck and hug him. Your cheek rests on his forehead, and you sway side to side slowly.  “You gotta be more careful, Cassie,” you mutter and kiss his head again.  He looks up at you, kissing your lips in reassurance. “I’m okay, really. It's not that big of a deal.”  “I know,” you mumble. “But I don’t wanna wait for the day it is a big deal.”  Cassian’s heart stutters for a second. Finally, he smiles and says, “I’ll be more careful next time. Promise.” 

Going shopping with Cassian 

“How's this?” he walks out of the fitting room wearing a tunic.  “No,” you shake your head immediately.  “Why? What's wrong with it?” he asked, looking down at himself to see if he was not wearing it right.  “It looks like an oven is wearing a tunic, Cassie,” you reply.  “Damn, baby,” he says and walks back into the fitting room to try something else on. 

But god forbid anyone says anything to Cassian while you’re there

The IC was sitting in the living of the House of Wind, laughing and chatting about different things all that once. Cassian said something in response to what Amren said in a conversation between her and Nesta.  Immediately, Amren and Mor started jesting Cassian, calling him an unintelligent brute.  You knew it was all fun and games and neither of them really meant it, but you saw the light leave Cassian’s eyes.  You glared daggers in their direction, demanding them they take it back right now or the consequences would not be pretty regardless of how powerful either of them was. When it comes to your mate, no amount of power will stop you from hurting whoever dares to hurt your mate.  They immediately stopped laughing at the look you gave them.  “We didn’t mean it, Cassian, I hope you know that. We’re sorry,” Mor immediately said and looked to you for approval.  You gave a slight nod in response but didn’t smile to let her know apologising did not make this behaviour okay.  Rhysand watched the entire interaction with cunning eyes, internally laughing at how adorable your protective instincts were.  “You found yourself a good one, brother,” he mind spoke to Cassian. 

We all know that Cassian is everyone’s rock in difficult situations. He’s the positive one who manages to make a joke out of every situation, makes a problem not seem like a problem and keeps everyone sane during difficult times. Sometimes, though, all of that gets to him and leads to very bad mental health days where he needs someone to be his rock and take care of him. 

Cassian lays in bed on his side, turned away from the door where you stood. You knew he hadn’t gotten out of bed since morning. That was already concerning given this male never skips a day of training but you just thought he was tired from last night the IC had spent at Rita’s where the two of you had danced and drank a lot.  Now, you weren’t so sure.  You approached the bed slowly, deliberately making your footsteps loud so he wouldn’t be startled. You stroked the bond lovingly, but he kept his side firmly closed.  You laid a gentle hand on his arm, thumb drawing soothing circles into his skin.  “Cassie,” you called softly. “What’s wrong, baby?”  Cassian didn’t reply but he opened his side of the bond, letting you feel what he felt at the moment. Immediately, negative thoughts and an overwhelming sadness engulfed your heart. Your breath stuttered for a second from the pain of what your mate was going through.  You moved to the other side of the bed and laid down so you were now facing Cassian. His dim eyes flicked to yours and you stroked his cheek lovingly.  “I’m here, love,” you said softly.  That was all Cassian needed to hear. He moved closer to you and you laid on your back, giving him room to rest his head on your chest. Your arms wound protectively around him, one hand scratching his scalp lightly. He sighed against you, melting into your embrace, and fell asleep feeling safe and loved and protected. 

tags: @berryzxx @thelov3lybookworm @sarawritestories @milswrites

Masterlist

[qwimblenorrisstan]

Lazy Sunday | Cassian x Reader

Summary: Lazy mornings with Cassian don’t always go as planned. Today is one of those days.

Word Count: 571

Warnings: smut, oral, pulling a muscle, giggly sex lol

Minors, do not interact!

A/N: ty to anon who requested this, sorry it’s just a little baby drabble, but it’s like midnight and I can’t sleep, so hope you enjoy<3

Requests are open!

It was a lazy Sunday afternoon, Cassian had skipped training that day, claiming that if he didn’t give his body a day of rest, then his muscles wouldn’t be able to heal and he wouldn’t actually grow any stronger. Supposedly.

You’d both munched down on some waffles the House had provided for breakfast and still hadn’t gotten dressed because when you’d tried to change into a different pair of pants, the bastard had pounced.

And now you were sat on the edge of the bed, hand lazily fisted in his hair as he lapped at your cunt with the laziest strokes you’d ever felt.

Your nails scratched against his scalp and he made a little hum of pleasure.

“You gotta get a haircut, Cass.”

You teased, only slightly breathless, a sleepy smile on your face. He pulled away only a moment to run a hand through his luscious locks, raising a brow.

“Nope.”

He said, making the p in the ‘nope’ pop dramatically, making you giggle quietly in response. Cassian had always taken his hair seriously, nearly crying when you’d shaved his beard off one day. Your hand in his hair tugged him back between your legs, and he rolled his eyes playfully at you, before beginning to suck your clit between his swollen lips.

You hummed in pleasure, hips rocking slowly, even as Cassian brought you to a gentle climax, not too intense or demanding. Just right for a morning like this.

“Feels good..”

You mumbled and could see him smirking, eyes still half-lidded from sleep. He tried to dive back in, only to be pulled away.

“Come lay down, it’s still early.”

You said, trying to pull him into the bed, but he gave you the most pathetic puppy eyes and pout you’d ever seen in your life, and it was your turn to roll your eyes playfully.

“Just a taste, please?”

He asked, and you shrugged. He immediately sprung back into action, moving to push your thigh up further, higher, but stopping when he heard you yelp.

A sudden little sharp pain in your leg, and—yup—you’d pulled a muscle, definitely.

“Quit, Cass, pulled a muscle.”

You muttered out, rubbing your eyes, watching as he got up from his knees and began pressing little kisses against your thigh, moving up to give you a soft peck on the lips as one of his large hands moved to hold the thigh that was hurting, gently rubbing and massaging into it as you hummed contentedly once again.

“Sorry, darlin’..”

He murmured in regards to your leg, and you could feel the regret through the bond before he tried to flood it with warm, fuzzy feelings to make you forget the pain while he half-heartedly pulled your pants and panties back up. He wiped his face off with his forearm, before grabbing the blanket from the floor to the side of the bed where it had been discarded and pulling it back over the both of you.

The both of you lay there for a few hours, you eventually drifting off to sleep with Cassian’s warm body on yours, his large palm massaging your thigh while sunlight spilled through the little openings in the curtains.

Cassian was soon to follow, eyes slowly becoming heavier as he watched you fall asleep, his breathing falling into a deep rhythm as he unconsciously nestled his head onto your shoulder, near the nook of your neck.

[daycourtofficial]

Falling in Love on the Fourth Floor - Part 3

Summary: Out of an act of desperation, you move in with a guy you kind of know who happens to have a really hot brother who lives next door.

(Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 4)

Author’s note: I’m a bit uncertain about this part tbh :/ on one hand I love it, on the other I’m not sure

It had been a few days since Azriel went with you to return the truck, and you hadn’t seen much of him or Cassian since. Cassian had told you they were both personal trainers at the same gym, and he even went so far as to put his schedule up on the fridge so you would know when he’d be gone.

Looking at the schedule, he had even left a sticky note telling you he had plans before work and that he wouldn’t be back all day.

Your day alone in the apartment didn’t go as well as you had hoped it would, your phone buzzing around noon, the name Dad lighting up your phone.

You sigh, letting it go to voicemail, and decide to call Feyre to avoid thinking about him. She picks up on the third ring, her voice chirping through the phone, “hello?”

“Hey Fey, do you wanna do something today? I don’t want to wallow all alone.”

She sighs over the phone, “I wish I could, but I’m walking into work right now. I can’t call out when they can see me walking in the doors.”

You sigh, “do you know if Mor’s free?”

You can hear some commotion from Feyre’s surroundings, like she’s walking into a building.

“Mor has that internship she just started, I think she’s busy getting things ready for that.”

A beat pauses before Feyre continues, “I gotta go, but I’ll call you when I get off, okay? We can do something tomorrow if you’re free.”

You smile, “can we go to that axe throwing place we’ve been talking about for ages?”

She laughs, “absolutely. I’ll even print out a photo of your dad and hang it up on the target. Okay, I really gotta go, but if you wanna text me you can. I’ll respond when I can. Love you!”

She waits for you to echo her sentiment before hanging up, leaving you alone again. You spend the day trying to distract yourself, finding anything you can to distance yourself from the loneliness you feel. You unpack a few boxes you hadn’t gotten to, and after being fully moved in, you pour yourself a glass of soda to commemorate the occasion.

You sip from your glass as you begin cleaning the apartment, organizing the pantry, cleaning out the fridge, hell you even strip Cassian’s bed and clean his sheets and comforter.

Once the place is clean, you run out to the store, picking up what you need to make your favorite meal. You unpack your groceries when you come back, pour yourself a glass of wine, and sigh in contentment at spending an evening alone cooking your favorite pasta dish. You are determined to salvage some part of today, even if it’s just with a nice dinner. You’re playing music from your phone, the sounds drowning out the notification of a voicemail from your father that you’ve been ignoring all day.

You sip your wine as you stir the pasta, however the blaring sound of an ad startles you, causing wine to go all over the front of your clothes. You sigh, looking to the ceiling for strength to not break down. You take some deep breaths before peeling off your wine soaked dress, opening the laundry door to throw it into the washing machine. You’re hopeful that getting it in immediately will help prevent a stain from setting in, but you still pour a little extra stain remover in.

Once you get the machine going, standing in your kitchen in your underwear, you decide to make the most of this. The day sucked. All day all you had wanted to do was hide under your covers, hide from the world. You took a deep breath and told yourself “I’m done hiding.”

Your favorite song starts playing, and knowing that Cassian won’t be home for several more hours, you dance. You jump around your apartment, whipping your head around, letting out the loose bun your hair was in for the day.

You skip around, the sounds of Super Trouper by ABBA drowning out the door opening until suddenly something stops your music. Turning around you find Rhys’s hand hovering over your phone, having just stopped the music, and Azriel, whose gaze is on you, soaking in every detail of your little show.

You blink a few times, trying to ensure this is not a nightmare, however you don’t snap back to reality until the timer goes off for the pasta. All three of you whip your heads towards the timer, it’s tone jarring all three of you back to the present.

You groan, starting to back away back to your room. “What are you guys doing here?” You exclaim, “but more importantly - please drain my pasta while I find pants.”

You slip into your room, finding a comfy pair of sweats and a crop top, coming back out to find Azriel draining your pasta into the colander.

“Well?” You ask, cutting up the chicken you had pan-fried earlier. Azriel won’t look you in the eye, a blush evident across his face as he’s turned in the opposite direction, facing away from you.

Rhysand doesn’t have the same affliction.

He smirks at you, “is this how Cassian gets greeted when he comes home? I must say I’d be more chipper coming home to that little show than to Azriel.”

Azriel does not respond to the jab. Instead, he picks up another knife, helping you cut. Rhys just stands behind you two, leaning against the fridge.

“Cassian most certainly does not get greeted by my bare ass when he comes home,” you respond indignantly. The two of you have finished chopping, so you motion for all the chicken and the pasta to go into the pan with the pesto sauce concoction you’ve made. Azriel helps you stir it, and once it’s evenly distributed, you two pop it into the oven.

“Well your ass wasn’t bare, it was slightly covered by your very cute-“

The task at hand done and a new timer set, you turn to face Rhys, cutting him off. “I spilled wine on my clothes and I didn’t want it to set and then I got carried away when Abba came on.”

He only smiles back, “got a hot date for dinner tonight?”

Azriel tenses ever so slightly, but you don’t think too much of it as you respond, “yeah word on the street is she has an incredible rack and a great ass.”

“Having seen them first hand I think the rumors are true.”

You roll your eyes, but decide you’re done with this game and want some sincerity.

“I had a shitty day and I just wanted my favorite meal.” You look down, crossing your arms. You don’t like being vulnerable, especially around people you just met. You think about Cassian, and how much he loves the two guys in front of you. Maybe you can take a leap, and perhaps they’ll catch you.

“I’d actually enjoy the company if you guys want to stay. I made plenty of pasta to wallow in so I think there’s enough to go around.”

Your eyes stay on the ground as you move your hands up and down your arms, a nervous movement. You watch as Azriel’s foot comes into view, standing in front of you as he gently taps his foot against yours, a silent request to look at him. “I love pasta,” he tells you, looking into your eyes. You’re struck by the absence of pity in them, and how they are full of sincerity, of kindness.

You look away from him when Rhys starts talking, “It’s decided. You got a two for one deal tonight - two hot dates for the evening.”

You smile, the thought of being alone almost overbearing, when you remember, “why did you guys come over here anyway?”

Azriel sheepishly looks away, clearly thinking about how they caught you half naked when they walked in the door. Rhys tells you, “we wanted to watch Forest Gump and we knew Cassian had it on Blu-ray.”

You nod, looking over at Cassian’s wall of dvds and blu-rays, which you had to admit was quite impressive. “I’ve never seen it - is it any good?”

When Cassian got off work from the gym, he thought he’d come home to a dark apartment, scrounging the fridge for any remnants of food. What he didn’t expect to find was his two brothers watching Forrest Gump, and seeing a tupperware container in the fridge with a sticky note with his name on it in Azriel’s neat script.

He walks in, Azriel shooting daggers at him. The audacity, Cassian thinks, watching a movie in my place and being annoyed that I’m here. That is until he comes close enough to notice your head in Azriel’s lap, a hand curled up on his thigh. His eyes linger on his brother’s hand that is slowly massaging your scalp, the hands he had always been so nervous and protective over. Cassian realizes he’s never seen his brother leave his hands to be so openly observed outside of his brothers.

He stares for a minute as your blanketed back slowly rises and falls, clearly asleep, before he turns, giving his brother a shit eating grin where they have a conversation without words. The conversation essentially boils down to Cassian’s eyebrows raising up and down, and Azriel’s continued scowl at Cassian’s inability to move through a room without making as much noise as possible.

Azriel doesn’t relax until Cassian is sitting on the other couch next to Rhys, tuning into the movie when Forrest is walking around Washington D.C.

“She didn’t even make it halfway through the movie,” Cassian whispers to Rhys.

“No,” Rhys replies, looking at you curled up on the couch, a soft smile on his face, “but she did ask us to stay for dinner.”

[gwynethshadowsinger]

My Thoughts about the Bonus Chapter(s)

Feysand - Happens around Ch. 22 (I think)

I do think everyone has spent a long time assuming Elain is sweet and innocent and that we will end up seeing a different side emerge when it's time for her story to be told. I think she's a lot like Lucien. Willing to stand back, but won't be afraid to step in and show that other side when needed. She'll access her surroundings beforehand, though, and act accordingly. Almost like a sly fox just waiting for their moment 👀

Feyre is right. If Elain had been wearing the gloves Lucien had gifted her the previous Solstice, she wouldn't have gotten hurt by that stubborn rosebush. Is this particular phrasing some type of foreshadowing for Elucien? Will Lucien protect her from any and all harm if she's just let him in instead of running away?

I loved finding out where the baby's name came from 😍

Azriel - Happens around Ch. 58/59 (I believe)

Poor Azriel. He just wants a mate and what Rhysand and Cassian has 😭

I didn't much care for his interaction with Elain. It felt wrong and off. He's full of negative, only sexual emotions, and him being around her is not good for him.

Azriel shouldn't be trying to go after a female who has not rejected the bond, especially knowing how he holds the mating bond in regard.

I also didn't like how Elain was willing to let Azriel kiss her so close to her (supposed) sleeping mate. Both of them were in the wrong here.

That rose necklace..... Elain was hurt once again by something with roses. This is the second time Sarah has mentioned her being hurt by something with roses. That's gotta be intentional on her part. Maybe Elain will give Lucien a chance now? I doubt she'd end up hurt by him. He's done everything to respect her and is just waiting on her to come to him. I really hope she does.

Rhysand asked all the right questions 👏

The Cauldron chose three sisters. Tell me how it's possible that my two brothers are with two of those sisters, yet the third was given to another. Boy... you couldn't even say Elain's name?!?! The Cauldron also only turned two sisters. Not three.... so he's already way off base....

Azriel admitted he didn't get far with his planning, certainly never behond the fantasies he pleasures himself to after saying Lucien would never be good enough for her...well that absolutely killed any lingering thoughts I had about a potential pairing between him and Elain. Yuck. I'd want a man to think of more than just sex and for his own sexual purposes. Lucien so far is the ONLY male good enough for Elain.

He'd been so vigilant about keeping away from Elain as much as possible, and had stayed up here to avoid her, and tonight... tonight had proved he'd been right to do so.

His interaction with Gwyn was 😍😍😍😍

I LOVE the shadow's reaction around Gwyn. How they dance with her breath. How they were calm and content to sit on Azriel's shoulders after something restless settled in Azriel. How they SUNG BACK IN ANSWER!!! If that isn't major foreshadowing, idk what is.

I'm insanely proud of how far Gwyn has came to.

Again...the necklace.... while I HATE he regifted it... I love this ending to the bonus chapter. How he found himself in front of Clotho, unconsciously.. almost like he was drawn by something 👀

He might not consider Gwyn a friend, BUT.... I say that might change in a big way.

THAT ENDING!!! The SPARK ✨️ The PICTURING OF GWYN'S EYES LIGHTING UP. THE TUCKING THE THOUGHT AND PICTURE AWAY DEEP DOWN WHERE IT GLOWED QUIETLY. THE SLIGHT SMILE THAT ACTION CAUSED THAT HE HAD TO CONCSCIOUSLY ERASE... OMG ARE THEY GOING TO BEMATES?!?!?!

A THING OF SECRET, LOVELY BEAUTY!!!! AHHH!!!!

These bonus chapters totally made me 100% an Elucien & Gwynriel supporter.

[blurbfics]

There'd Better Be a Mirrorball | Azriel x OFC [part twelve]

Summary: Azriel frets over Eowyn's wellbeing. Gwyn delivers an unpleasant message.

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: angst, yearning, self-deprecating talk, anger, worry, self-doubts

a/n: can't be a proper slow-burn without some yearning, right? sorry lovelies, we gotta go through Angst Road to get to Smut and Fluff Blvd. all i have to say is please go vote! and of course, rest in peace liam payne (rip my eternal hope that we'd see the boys together again at some point)

Minors, do not interact.

part eleven

masterlist

"But she once fell through the street

Down a manhole in that bad way

The underground drip

Was just like her scuba days

Days

Daze"

Interpol, Stella was a diver and she was always down

He goes four nights without seeing her.

Three days and four nights of prowling the entrance to the library, of having his shadows slither down to investigate and report on her progress. Three days of not seeing her, and although Cassian tried to console him with the reminder that he’s gone longer without seeing her when he goes on long missions, his brother is well aware that it isn’t the same and with a single look from Azriel, pointed and unfaltering, he doesn’t try to bring it up to him again.

All the waiting and the worrying and the asking, the begging for the smallest crumbs of information from any priestess that came into his path (that of which was usually Gwyn, who blessedly went directly to him to report on Eowyn’s wellbeing), was torture for him.

And Azriel knew torture. Knew it quite literally like the back of his marred grotesque hands.

He doesn’t sleep that night, the first night. Didn’t sleep much the other three but that first night, after the priestesses kicked him out and he was ‘persuaded’ to leave the library altogether with Rhys’s logical reasoning and Cassian’s… physical cajoling, he allowed them to move him only as far as the entrance to the library leading up to the House of Wind and then he stayed there, alone and in silence, awake the entire night. 

His shadows, finding it easier to sneak through, didn't even confirm with him before going down to look after her at their own accord before he could even think about sending them out to do it, and they stayed by her side to relate to him everything that happened to her.

That is, until he considered that what he was doing was an invasion of her privacy, so he retracted them much to their (and admittedly his) chagrin and he remained there, fretting and pacing, murmuring to his shadows and to himself. He found he could not sit longer than two and a half minutes without feeling frantic energy build within him, and sleep came to no avail. Throughout that time, he finally took Cassian’s invitation to stay at the House of Wind, if only to wash and get his meals, in the rare occasion he remembered to eat.

The second day went by much the same but he had the entirety of the day to consider not only the turn of events in the apothecary and what the herbalist revealed, but particularly her words as she was having her episodes. While still herself, she told him not to pay any heed to her words yet how was he supposed to forget her pained cries?

Her voice echoed through his mind.

“B-but I did! I swear it ada*, I did! I mended every single one of your— no no, ada, please!”

The things the shadows managed to capture while still inside only got worse in nature. The first words she had spoken in his ear, however, those words spoken in another language echoed through his mind day and night. The frustration at not knowing what they meant was driving him half insane. On the third day, after hearing from Gwyn that she was doing much better, now seeming much more lucid— he had admittedly sniffed derisively at that but made no further comment— he took to the skies and paid a quick visit to his brother.

Without any hemming and hawing he went straight to the point. “I need you to translate something.”

Rhys was quick with it, immediately breaching past Azriel’s lowered mental walls to dig his talons to peer inside. Azriel freely offered him the memory, not lingering on the details he wanted to keep only to himself, like the feel of her soft supple body in his arms, and the way she’d dug her face in his neck and inhaled, consequently bringing her so close to his face that he could do nothing but freely bask in her scent himself.

Clearly guessing where Azriel’s train of thought inevitably trailed off to, Rhys didn’t linger long inside Azriel’s head but didn’t offer the answer with the immediacy Azriel was seeking.

“Well?” He pressed in a manner that was more natural to Cassian.

“It’s a very ancient tongue. One I thought to be extinct long ago,” Rhys answered at last. “I’ll need to ask Amren.”

“There’s no time,” Azriel hissed, running a hand through his hair, “she won’t be here until next week.”

“Amren arrives today,” Rhys raised an eyebrow, his own violet eyes scanning Azriel in concern. “Have you slept at all, brother?”

Azriel dismissed him. “There’s no time,” he repeated under his breath. With shadows furling faster around him, he turned to leave.

“I’ll let you know what I learn,” is the last thing he heard from the High Lord before he stepped into his shadows back to the House of Wind’s entrance to the library.

By the fourth day, his shadows— disobedient things that they were— reported back that Eowyn’s seizing visions were becoming few and far between and she was now resting, reading and conversing with Clotho and Gwyn. After he’d made sure that Eowyn was faring better, he accepted Nesta's insistence for him to have dinner with her and Cassian, only to have Gwyn herself step into the kitchen as they ate.

He startled when the young priestess stepped in, however, heart in his throat at the thought of something happening to Eowyn in the ten minutes he’d been away. “Is everything-“

“Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt,” she blushed shyly and the way she carried herself spoke of curious trepidation, not the concerned urgency he feared. She did, however, seem rather tired and he found he was endlessly grateful to her for caring for Eowyn in a way he couldn’t do. In a way Clotho hadn’t allowed him to.

(It sent a sharp shooting pain through his chest to consider that it was Eowyn herself who hadn't wanted him there; that she didn’t trust him to stay at her side after the long months of spending almost every day together, of having gotten to know each other so intimately. It was easier to blame Clotho for not allowing him to stay. The alternative left him with a feeling that was too raw and ugly to consider at the moment.)

“You’re not,” Nesta said mildly, if a touch concerned herself. “Everything okay with Eowyn?”

“Oh yes, she’s doing much better,” Gwyn assured them quickly, “she’s been reading dreadfully boring old texts all day about minerals or rocks or something, so you know that means she’s pretty much back to normal.”

Cassian and Nesta immediately invited her to sit and eat with them, which she did after a brief moment of hesitation. “I mostly just came up to let you guys know the good news and deliver a message from Eowyn saying that she’ll join us tomorrow morning, but she won’t be able to stay for training with Azriel,” she gave Azriel a quick pout as if to emphasize her point. He chuckled lightly at the sight, feeling a heavy weight lift off his shoulders at the certainty of seeing Eowyn the following morning. The pang of disappointment that shot through him at not being able to see her during their session together was immediately quelled by the reminder that she still had to take it easy and recuperate after such a dreadful episode– which inevitably led to the reassuring thought of spending that time with her anywhere else for the day, taking care of her if she allowed him to. “For some time.”

It took him a second to understand.

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” Gwyn swallowed nervously, “we were talking about training and how she’s doing much better now. Remember Cassian? When you mentioned last session how she can start training with Em and Nesta and I? And well, she-“ she continued to ramble, speaking quickly, “well she thinks that since she’s pretty much caught up now, she doesn’t have to stay after and train with you anymore.”

“She doesn’t get to decide when she’s caught up,” he hissed through his teeth, incredulously, still trying to wrap his mind around her words. He narrowed his eyes, unbelieving, “and why doesn’t she tell me this herself?”

“Well she said she would, but thought it would be a good idea if I just… told you, while you're here,” she blushed again, looking up at him through her lashes. “She… well, she insisted she doesn’t need to train as much anymore.”

He pursed his lips in annoyance, but tried not to let it show as he considered Gwyn’s words, still reeling. He zoned out for the remainder of his quick dinner, too lost in his head as he considered Gwyn’s announcement, spoken with such nonchalance that he couldn’t bring himself to accept it.

Still, the more he considered that, the more he considered the way Eowyn had so viciously attacked the herbalist and the more he thought about that, the more he thought about the herbalist’s revelation. 

She said that Eowyn was a witch, and had Eowyn tried to deny it at all? Now that he thought about it, he realized she hadn’t, but she hadn’t confirmed it either. Had she lied right to his face when she talked about her abilities?

He felt his mind begin to clear now that the concern for her wellbeing was wearing off. He considered everything that had happened since he came back from his mission to find her stomping through the streets of Velaris, seeming angry and unlike herself. He hated himself for not having considered telling Rhysand about the herbalist’s accusation.

Witches were extinct. Those that were rumored to survive the Great Witch Purge, lived in the far reaches of the Middle, where they practiced all sorts of dark magic and were rumored to hate all faeries, but were known to consume their blood to be able to access their magic.

Witches were typically considered evil beings by all species, but most importantly, they were known to be extremely powerful. 

Rhysand, however, was never the type to believe the stereotypes applied to different creatures, an Illyrian and Shadowsinger like himself included, and knew better than to believe the necessary facade of dark infamy and notoriety in order to survive in this world as a powerful creature, lest they be hunted down to be enslaved and used for barbaric acts.

To have a witch under one’s control would be just as dangerous, if not more, as having access to the Cauldron itself.

Rhys had never expelled nor hunted a witch himself, but it wasn’t in his nature to outright mistreat or deny a being that could be a possible ally, as well as an equal.

For only the briefest of instances– born out of centuries worth of friendship, of fraternal familiarity, acceptance, and love for his brother– he considered telling Rhysand about the accusation made against her.

But he wouldn’t tell his brother about Eowyn, he realized grimly. Both ashamed at himself for withholding possibly valuable and integral information that could strengthen their Court and the general citizens of all of Prythian; and ashamed by even considering betraying Eowyn’s trust before he could even have the opportunity to speak to her about it first.

If he slept at all that night, it was sparse and filled with dark and tortuous nightmares of his family hating him. The thought of Eowyn hating him left a sinking empty void in the center of his being that stole all sleep and breath away from him altogether.

When he woke up hours before the break of dawn, having dreamt of her briefly, an entire audience of hers, laughing at him as he opened up and shared with her a part of himself that he didn’t think worthy of sharing with anyone else, his guilt and grief turned into simmering anger.

So when he saw her the next morning, wearing a covering that revealed only her eyes, he approached her and asked, “how are you feeling?”

“Much better,” her voice was calm and neutral, lacking both the usual teasing lilt and the anger and desperation of the last time they’d spoken. “Thank you for bringing me back to the library. And for asking for me while I was indisposed.”

The way her voice came out emotionless, formal, and cold while her eyes looked just as dark and beautiful as ever— even rested, for once— pissed him off even more.

“Good,” he snapped and turned away from her, refusing to watch as she walked over to her usual spot and decided, at that moment, to not look at her at all for the rest of the session. Still, he was always aware of her presence and as his shadows reminded him, they had not promised to look away from her, so he knew, even without looking at her, that she trained in unfaltering unison with the rest of the priestesses. 

Two things happened during that session. First was the feel of Rhys talons in his head as his research finally paid off; then came Eowyn’s impressive but entirely unsurprising achievement, for she was a natural warrior and she had made great success in the months they had trained together. 

Failing to remember his resolution to not look at her, he watched her in complete open awe– as expressive and adoringly as a stoic and unemotional male like him could show.

In an effortless and perfect stance, she stood before the pole with a familiar light-consuming obsidian dagger held in an offensive hold above her head, hips and feet positioned perfectly, knees bent at just the right angle.

At the end of that morning session, the morning after she’d had someone else tell him she didn’t need him any more, Eowyn cut the ribbon. 

While he was indescribably proud of her achievement, the act was like a slap in the face. 

As if the Cauldron or Fate or the Mother herself were sharing a laugh at his expense, her action only reinforced the words Rhys had translated in his mind earlier in the day: I will never cede.

—

After training, as all the Valkyries filed out of the training ring and back into the library– Eowyn among the last few who happily celebrated her successful cut– he called out her name.

She pretended she didn’t hear him. 

His irritation was only fuelled by Cassian’s knowing look and understanding pat to the shoulder before taking off into the skies to offer Azriel some privacy.

As soon as his brother took off, he tried to call Eowyn’s name again but despite it catching the attention of a few priestesses, Gwyn among them, who quickly turned to Eowyn and nudged her, Eowyn did not stop.

He hadn’t taken her for a coward. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Beyond annoyed at that point, Azriel sent off a few shadows to cinch around her waist and stop her from going further, even pulling her back a little.

The surprise in her eyes was brief before her face fell back into cool neutrality. The sight of it pissed him off so much, he finally understood his family’s frustration at him when he schooled his features back into place.

She waved at the others to continue without her and then turned to him, her gaze blazé and unlike her.

“Didn’t Gwyn tell you?”

“Tell me what exactly,” he bit, wanting to hear it from her.

“I won’t be able to stay and train with you after our group sessions anymore.”

It was a simple statement of fact, and the way in which she said it, so nonchalantly and unbothered, had his cool anger boiling in his veins, fueled by the hurt in his chest.

“Why?”

She looked away then, but not for long. She observed him quietly for a moment, seeming to be thinking of how to form her words. “I just… don’t think I need it anymore,” he saw it coming yet it still struck him- this time in the pit of his stomach, “the main reason why I accepted the extra training was to wear off some of the excess energy I felt, but I’m doing better now, now that it’s all over,” she waved her hand casually, as if her being so ill and delirious for days was a normal occurrence.

“You’ll have questions, I imagine,” she tilted her head and he felt how she watched him, taking him in. He wondered if she smelt or felt the anger rolling off of him, if she knew of the growing desire and necessity for her. She didn’t let him reply to her, merely shook her head, “it’s not a good time right now-“

“Don’t you dare-“

“I have a lot of work to catch up on,” she interrupted him. She looked to the stairs and sighed before turning back to him. “Are you free tonight? For dinner?”

His heart leaped to his throat, “yes.”

She nodded, “Nesta and Gwyn, they… they have a dinner planned tonight. You’re welcome to join.”

He deflated slightly at that, disappointed it wouldn’t be just them. Another thought struck him, however, for how would she eat if her face was covered? 

With a kindled excitement he managed to control, he nodded to her, releasing his shadows from her waist to let her go. “I’ll see you tonight.”

*ada is elvish for father in tolkien’s lotr’s lore. all credit goes to him. he is, of course, a great inspiration of mine

taglist: @lilah-asteria , @a-courtof-azriel , @honk4emoboyz , @feyretopia , @mrsjna , @buttermilktea11 , @bravo-delta-eccho , @kylieinwonderland , @adventure-awaits13 ,

[xxvalkyriesxx]

Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going!

Thank you @popjunkie42 @jsmelodies @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk @moodymelanist @witch-and-her-witcher for tagging me <3 <3 Love you all <3

1. How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024?

81,805 ����😊

2. How many fics did you complete this year?

So far only 6 one-shots! The rest of my multi-chapter fics are still ongoing.

3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?

This is my first year writing ACOTAR fics so I started 4 ongoing fics!

4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?

This is like picking a favorite kid haha, but Flying Changes has definitely change my life for the better. It just started off from a simple idea I posted and the reaction I got was explosive in the best way possible.

I rode for eight years when I was younger before I had to give it up for a lot of reasons. One day I would love to return to it, but for right now I'm reconnecting to it through my favorite couple <3

5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?

So two pieces I think best fit this question which is The Joker and the Queen and Labyrinth of the Night.

The Joker and the Queen is a fluff rom-com piece for the Acotar Gift Exchange and it's different my usual smut and or angsty fics, but in the best ways! It's such a fun piece to write and make Nessian be idiots in love.

I also chose Labyrinth of the Night as it's my only feysand fic (for now 👀). I'm a Nessian writer so writing outside my main ship is always a bit hard. I haven't always been a fan of feysand but I've read a few feysand fics that I just loved that I wanted to take a swing.

6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception?

Honestly, The Blood on your Hands. I was mad about HOFAS once again, so I wrote a small fic of Cassian beating the brakes off Rhys for his reaction to Nesta (don't worry, Rhys is fine. Maybe I'll write a sequel where Feyre plays doctor xD).

I wrote this fic getting out my feelings and before I knew it the reception was huge. It's my most popular one-shot to date.

7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)

Probably Keeping the Summer Nights Away. It's a small fluff piece for Nessian week, and it's just very simple, but I honestly just loved writing Nessian doing a self-care night together haha.

8. Who is an artist that inspired you?

Oh jeez so many but to name a few - @dustjacketdraws madschofield (instagram), llibiarts (instagram), @jmoonjones, @janearts, @vivictory-draws.

These artists amazing at what they do and their art always makes my jaw drop!

9. Who is an author that inspired you?

Oh my goodness, again a lot of people but to name the ones who really convinced me (literally just by their writing alone) to jump head first back into writing fanfcition - @c-e-d-dreamer @kale-theteaqueen @separatist-apologist @moodymelanist to name a few.

I read ACOTAR back in 2020 so a little a before it really blew up, and eventually I ended up on Tumblr again seeking actoar content when Twitter got too toxic for me.

I was fanfic reader for the longest time. I did write for other fandoms when I was younger, but I either deleted or orphaned my works as I grew out of said fandoms. So for about four years, I just read fanfiction from the ACOTAR fandom. It was too the point that I tried to read whatever new Nessian fic was uploaded daily haha.

I wanna shout out one of the first Nessian fics I read, A Favor. It was the first fanfic that really spoke to me that I wasn't alone in how I felt about Nesta and her treatment with Cassian/the IC and vise versa. Come to find out years later, it's a classic for a lot of Nessian stans.

10. Who is a new author you discovered?

Ahhh you gotta check them out - @jsmelodies @littedidyouknow @beesays @wishcamper @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk @unhealthyfanobsession @foundress0fnothing

11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?

Not at the moment

12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?

Taking a chance at writing again <3

13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?

That I should be kinder to myself, and it's probably best to start off small. I started a fic back in March/April of this year with Eris/OC and I think the concept was good, but there was so much thought I was putting into, that I just ended up bored. It was going to be a heavy plot story about Rhysand's daughter that he had with Amarantha that featured dragons and a ton of OCs, but it just honestly back fired lol.

It was way too complicated and I didn't have the spoons for it. And you know, it happens lol. I have since deleted the fic because I don't plan to work on it.

14. What is your advice?

It's the most basic writing advice, but write what you know. If you go too far out of your comfort zone, it may be more damning for you in the long run.

Also if you can, use a text-to-speech service to help hear your story before you post it. I use the immersive reader on Outlook (I don't send my fics anywhere lol, but immersive reader is available for drafts). It's not perfect, but it helps give me a second pair eyes when I'm tired of visually editing.

15. What are your creative goals for 2025?

Finish at least two if not three of my ongoing fics! Participate in more character and ship weeks/weekends. Maybe finally get enough money to get a commission done for one of my fics.

No pressure but @foundress0fnothing @beesays, @velarisdusk. If you've already done this, no worries <3

[garricks4thwingqueen]

Special Package for Solstice

Synopsis:  Winter Solstice with the Inner Circle Reader is Azirels sister and Cassian's wife and mate. The pair had been mates ever since they were 16.

Word Count:1219

Trigger Warnings: Pregnancy announcement

                                                               Y/N POV 

    “Ready for your first winter solstice in Velaris?” You asked Feyre as both of you were finishing the final touches in the townhouse. The boys were prepping for their snowball fight as you and Feyre put up the final decorations and prepping breakfast. Feyre nods in response; “I am but most importantly are you ready to tell Cassian about your special package?” She asked handing you the smallest stocking which was also labeled Cassian that you put between his and your bigger stockings.  

   You stepped back admiring the handiwork of your and Feyre’s stocking hanging work above the fireplace. “Yeah I’m ready to see his reaction and lift this shield that I’ve held in place to keep the surprise.” “That’s gotta be tough.”  “It is with the mate bond that everything has been an open book for over 500 years, I wouldn’t have it any other way, but keeping something from him just seems not right you know?” “I get that, but I think you waited for the best time to tell him; especially since winter solstice is his favorite holiday.” You chuckled at her response. “Oh my god Feyre you have no idea. He lights up like a little kid each year.”  

   “But grab my hand, we need to be somewhere before you miss the chance to witness the best tradition.” Feyre gave you a questioning look but grabbed onto your hand anyway. “Where are we winnowing?” She asked. “The cabin. Everyone else is already there.” She squeezed your hand as you both winnowed to the cabin. You smiled as you landed next to Mor and Amren; as the boys' annual snowball fight was underway. “Each year the boys have a snowball. Last several years my brother has come out on top. Cass and Rhys have been trying to take him down since.” Feyre chuckled and asked “Whose winning this year?”

    “It’s a little early but I have a feeling it's going to be Azriel again.” Mor chuckled. “Great, we will have to listen to them complain again this year.” You said giggling as Azriel got Cassian with a rather large snowball and Cassian started to chase Azriel with a handful of snowballs. “We will have to break out Rhysie’s good stuff.” Mor said. “Unfortunately I won't be taking part in that aspect of solstice celebrations this year.” You said. 

   Mor and Amren both looked at you questiongly for a split second. “Oh my god are you?” Amren asked. You nodded in response with a finger over your lips. “He doesn’t know yet does he?” Mor asked as you all still took in the scene in front of you, sure enough it was looking like your brother was going to win another year. “No. I went to Madja last week when they were on the small mission after not feeling well. She confirmed my suspicions and I’ve had a shield up keeping it from him knowing that it would be a perfect solstice gift.” Mor nodded and squealed again “Oh my god I’m going to be an auntie!” She said squealing so loud you were worried the boys would overhear. 

   You pulled your friend into a tight hug hoping it would shush her up. “Oh I’m sorry that was a little loud. I can't wait to see Cass’s reaction. It's going to be the absolute best. How do you plan on telling him?”  “I got a mini stock with his name on it and there is a little pair of baby socks in there and a small teddy bear.” “Oh my god that is the most adorable thing.” Mor said, still having a death grip of a hug on you. 

                                        * Later that evening*

  You were all back in the town house in Velaris and gathered around a wonderful solstice feast. You sat in your usual dining spot which was between Cassian and Azriel. “I love you.” Cass whispered quietly in your ear and gave it a little nibble. “I love you too. What did you get me for solstice?” Cassian chuckled while he rubbed a hand up  and down your thigh. “Ah my love always trying to sneak an early gift. But not until after what you tell me you got me.” He said softly. “Oh absolutely not. Not until gift god time.” You said softly with a hint of a tease.

   “What's this stocking?” Cassian asked, eyeing the smaller stocking when you all retreated to the sitting room after the meal. “It;s your second stocking.” You said coming up next to him and grabbing it off the fireplace mantel. “Love you didn’t have to get me two. I’m the one that should be spoiling you.” You couldn’t help but giggle. “Cass you have done enough spoiling me over all these years it’s my turn. Just open it.” You said putting the small stocking in his hands.  

  You watched in the most amount of love you had ever felt for your mate as he pulled out the tiny pair of red socks and little bear that you had made to match his siphon and wings. “Love are you-” He asked. You smiled softly, taking both of his much larger hands into your smaller ones as you lifted the shield you had up for nearly a week that blocked your pregnancy from Cassian. “Oh my princess.” He said softly, placing both his hands onto your stomach as he started caressing it. How long have you known?” “Just last week. I went to see Madja when you boys were gone and she confirmed my suspicions.” 

 “Oh my sweet Y/N, this is the best solstice gift ever.” He said as tears started to form in his eyes. You reached up and wiped them away. It was rare that you would witness your mate cry.  It would always tug at your heartstrings a little more each time especially being able to fully feel his emotions down your mate bond. “We're going to be parents.” He said softly, dropping to his knees and placing many kisses on your belly.  You couldn’t help but giggle softly as you started running your fingers through your mates hair. 

   “I promise with all my heart I’m going to take the best care of you over these next ten months.” He said softly. “I know you will my love.” “We’ll have a baby to celebrate during the next holiday season.” He said softly as if he was still trying to process it all. “Madja said my due date would be roughly around October 15 of next year.” “October 15.” Cassian repeated. “I can’t wait to meet our little bat.” Cassian said softly. “I can’t wait either my love. We will finally have our little family.”  “Best solstice ever.” Cassian said softly, still peppering kisses all over your belly. “I can’t wait to see that baby bump on you princess, you're going to glow so much.” “You really think so Cassi?” “Think so? I know so my mate, my everything. Happy solstice my love of my life.” “Happy solstice my sexy general. I love you.” “I love you too.” Cassian said softly now standing back up as he placed a soft kiss on your forehead. Azriel and the others now coming over to join you both to congratulate their family on the wonderful news. 

[famouscyclenerd]

🗣🔊🗣🔊Everybody gets a mate!!!!!!

But why though? Since mates are so rare?🤔

Well first of all Sarah really likes the soulmates trope... if you couldn't tell.. all her main pairings are mated. And that's pretty much why.

You also gotta remember that fae are more or less immortal. If you live longer - the chances of finding your mate grows, right? Especially if your mate is also fae and therefore immortal as well. Rhysand, Cassian, Eris, Mor, Azriel, Tamlin are all over 500 years old. That's half a millennium without a mate. Which is a really long time even for fae.

"Shit, Feyre - I'm not that old." - Lucien Vanserra (a 300+ year old sexy fae male, mind you) Even he thinks 500 is old af.

So what are the patterns for mated pairs? How, and why, and when a bond snaps for each individual differs.

We have Rhys who bascially knew it the first time he met Feyre, but it snapped for him the first time he saw her again after she was turned fae. While Feyre had an inkling, I guess, but she literally had to be told that Rhys was her mate to be able to comprehend it, though she was well aware of the concept of mates long before that. And therefore so were we.

Cassian had suspected it the first time he met Nesta, while she knew it for a while as well but refused to acknowledge it. The bond didn't form between them until winter solstice in SF however.

Kallias and Viviane knew each other since they were kids, but the bond didn't snap between them before they were well into adulthood.

Rhys' parents bond snapped instantly. There is little to know about them however, given that they're both dead. But if it didn't snap instantly, his mother's wings would have been clipped.

Lucien only reacted to Elain as she was pulled towards the cauldron (which to me hinted at a possible mating bond as it was remarked by Feyre several times before it was revealed) and the bond snapped instantly for both of them after she was turned fae.

Sarah is a storyteller. There is no clear pattern for mating bonds because Sarah decides how it develops. What works best for the greatest love story? She alone decides who will be mates based on personality and compatibility between the characters. She is no stranger to retconning stuff to make different romantic pairings work e.g changing Lucien's mate from Nesta to Elain (also changing his heritage because that would go well with Elain) and figuring out that Mor and Azriel wouldn't work as well as she initially thought.

A common denominator however (besides them being mates) is that none of the parings stories starts off with them already being in love. SJM always writes about the process of the pairs falling in love with each other. It's what I personally prefer as well. If they are already in love, then the love story is kinda over as well tbh.

Anyways...

If the patterns were the same, it would be boring and even more predictable. Had Feyre found out at the end of ACOTAR and at the same time as Rhysand, then there would have been no more speculation in anticipation for the second installment. Tamlin was still Feyre's main love interest at the end of book 1. It was probably obvious to many, but Sarah was leaving hints at them being mates all throughout ACOTAR and ACOMAF.

The bond snapped for elucien during the cauldron scene where Lucien whispered it out of shock because it makes the scene even more intense. *GASP* OMG THEY'RE MATES!!! BUT LUCIEN ALWAYS THOUGHT JESMINDA WAS HIS MATE AND ELAIN IS ENGAGED!!! THE DRAMA!!!! It also sets up a different kind of love story where both parts from the beginning are aware of their mating bond. Lucien longing after Elain while she avoids him is Sarah stirring up the most angsty love story full of pining.

If they would serve rejected mates, then Sarah wouldn't bother making Helion Lucien's biological father. It would have been set up a lot better, where we see them talking to each other, but it's telling that they don't work well together as they have gotten to know each other and there is no chemistry between them. Where they are actually indifferent towards each other, but you can cleary tell that they are intensely aware of each others presence. Lucien longs for Elain, whilst she feel some type of way about him and trust me, it's not indifference. Sarah deliberately decides to not have them talk nor confront each other about the bond because she is saving that for their book. You gotta properly know your mate before deciding to reject them. The what if's would haunt them otherwise.

WHICH TO ME SOUNDS FUN AS HELL BTW. I'LL EAT THAT SHIT UP!!!!!! I'M SO EXCITED FOR THEIR STORY, IT'S DIFFICULT TO EVEN COMPREHEND THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO AREN'T.🥺

So will Azriel get a mate? Knowing Sarah's preferences when it comes to romance, yes. Absolutely!

And I see no other romantic interest for him than miss Gwyneth Berdara herself. Az is a lucky guy!! :D

This is not confirmed, but in my (and many others) opinion, it was heavily hinted at in Az infamous bonus chapter that they are mates.

A headcanon that I've seen hopping around is that Gwyn is more aware of their bond than Az, which I like a lot. At least that she'll realize it before he does as he doesn't see himself worthy of a mate nor love in general, though he craves it more than anything. We haven't seen that before. FUN!!

He will walk around, unaware that what he desires the most is right in front of him. While simantaniously developing feelings for Gwyn as they spend more and more time together.

I'LL GOBBLE THAT SHIT UP, YE HEAR ME!!!

GODDAMMIT SARAH JANET GIVE US SOME NEWS😤!!! April is THE month guys, I can feel it🧘‍♀️

[acourtofladydeath]

TTBW Chapter 1

Chapter 1 of TTBW has now been posted to AO3. Please make sure you read all tags with every chapter of this fic that is posted. I will be updating as I go. Read the beginning before the cut, and the entire chapter here!

Nyx shrieked joyfully in his uncle’s grasp as Cassian banked to the right. The wind caught both their wings, Nyx’s still so small and delicate as they flew. Cassian held his nephew tightly around the waist as he tried to get the mischievous four year old to get used to the feeling of the air as it rushed past the diaphanous structures still developing within his wings. 

As they leveled out, Nyx’s wings went limp and he clapped his hands together, “Uncle Cassie again, again!” Cassian chuckled softly to himself as he looked out over the waters next to the River House where he held his flying lessons with Nyx. 

“Okay little pyxie, but you’ve gotta hold your wings out for me! Big and strong, like we talked about.” Cassian could feel as Nyx held his breath and braced his wings out from his tiny body. Nyx’s wings were still so small they barely went past the breadth of Cassian’s shoulders. “Look I’m doing it!!” Nyx shouted back at him. As he peered over his little shoulder the young male’s violet eyes shined with excitement at his achievement. Cassian could barely hold back his own tears as pride rushed through his body. He choked back his emotion as he spoke encouragingly to his nephew.

“You’re doing it big guy!” Cassian made sure they were close enough to the shore that the rest of the family could see Nyx’s achievement before he prepared to bank again. “Alright Nyx, think you can hold them steady for this turn?” 

“I’m a big boy! I can do it.” The determination in Nyx’s voice sent another burst of emotion through Cassian as prepared to bank. “Okay, on the count of three buddy. One… two… three!” 

Cassian softly curved above the shore and Nyx’s wings stayed stretched wide through the entire turn. Nesta, Azriel, Rhysand, and Feyre all cheered from the shore as the pair flew by. Once they were out of the turn Cassian landed, he turned his nephew in his arms to face him.

“I did it! I did it!” Nyx shouted and raised his still plump little fists in the air in celebration. 

Cassian held him in one arm as he also fist pumped the air in celebration and laughed along with his nephew. “You did such a good job Nyx!” 

When Nyx had calmed slightly, Cassian knelt and placed the little male on the ground to stand before him. Nyx looked intently into his uncle’s eyes as Cassian placed one hand on his shoulder. “Now, remember what we talked about. Your wings are still growing. They’re not as strong as mine or your dad’s or Uncle Az’s yet.” 

Nyx looked at his uncle intently as he spoke, but chimed in “or mommy’s right? She has wings too! But not all the time, like daddy. She can put them away. But I can’t.” 

Cassian smiled at his nephew, the intuitive little bugger. “That’s right. Your mom and dad have different wings. But you and I can’t take our wings off and we can’t put them away. What does that mean Nyx?” 

Nyx looked seriously back at Cassian, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. “It means I have to be extra super careful not to hurt them. They’re my wings and no one else's and I only get one pair so I have to take care of them.” 

“Yes, exactly bud, great job. What else do you have to remember about your wings?” Cassian smiled encouragingly at Nyx to continue.

The little male responded with sincerity, eyes and nose still scrunched tight. “That no one else can touch them unless they ask and I say it’s okay, and I should only say it’s okay if I know them extra super well like you or Uncle Azzie.” 

Cassian nodded. “That’s right, little pyxie. You did a great job today, you know that?” 

A huge grin spread across Nyx’s entire face at his uncle’s compliment. He responded eagerly as he excitedly bounced on the balls of his feet. “Does that mean I get to fly all by my own next time?” 

Cassian chuckled as he responded. “Not so fast, big guy. Before our next lesson I want you to work on your wing flaps for me. We need to make sure your muscles are big and strong so they can support you without my help okay?” 

Nyx looked down at his feet, a defeated look on his face leaving his bottom lip slightly wobbly. Cassian used his free hand to tilt his nephew’s gaze back up to meet his. “Hey, don’t get upset. You’re doing so well! Only a few more lessons okay? And then you and I can fly over the river together but separate, I promise.” 

The young boy, so small and new to life, perked up a bit at that as he responded. ��You’ll take me first right? Don’t tell my dad but your lessons are my favorite. I want to fly together but separate with you first.” 

Those damn emotions hit Cassian again at his nephew’s words and he swallowed back more tears. “I promise Nyx, the first time you’re ready to fly without one of us holding you, I’ll be the one to take you.” 

Nyx rushed forward and hugged his uncle, arms wrapped so tightly around Cassian’s neck he could barely breathe. But he’d never stop Nyx from embracing him like this, not in a million years. Once the tiny bat let go, he raced off to tell his mom and Auntie Ness all about how well he did in his flying lesson. Cassian stood and brushed off his knees as his brothers approached. 

“Well, that went well,” Rhysand said as he stood next to his Cassian with a proud smile on his face. 

“He’s doing so well, Rhys. I don’t know many younglings that can fly as strongly as he is at that age.” Cassian stared off after his nephew as he raced into Nesta’s arms. His mate scooped Nyx up into her grasp with ease and twirled him around as pride shone across her features. 

Rhysand watched where Cassian’s gaze fell and joined his soft reverie as Feyre hugged her arms around Nesta, which left Nyx sandwiched between the sisters and showered in love. Azriel, ever the serious brother, cut into the soft moment. 

“Cass, we wanted to talk to you about tomorrow.” Rhysand raised his eyebrows and looked over toward their brother, already masked in nervous shadows. “Way to really bury the lead Az,” before he looked toward Cassian, a look of sincerity on his face, “but he’s not wrong Cass.” 

Cassian crossed his arms over his chest as he looked between his brothers, who both wore concerned expressions. “Alright, you two look like scouts with horrible information who don’t want to spill the news. Well, spill.” 

Rhys straightened his posture while the shadows flurried more quickly around Azriel’s shoulders. It was the High Lord who spoke first. “I know you’ve been really looking forward to tomorrow and think it will make a big difference in your and Nesta’s plans in Illyria but-”

Azriel cut Rhys off stoney faced, “Cassian there have been serious death threats. Are you sure it’s really a good idea for you to let loose with these men when they’re the very same ones calling for your head on a spike?”

Cassian huffed out a breath and rolled his eyes. “You sound like Nesta. Look, Az, you have your mission in Autumn tomorrow, and Rhysand has Velaris to guard with Mor and Amren gone.” Cassian clapped a hand on each of his brother’s shoulders as he said with more confidence than he actually felt, “I’ve received more death threats than the three of us combined could count. Nothing’s gone wrong before, why would it now?” 

His brothers looked obviously unconvinced by Cassian’s attempt at bravado. “Look, Devlon will be there. He’s been on our side since day one of this rebuild. Nesta, Emerie, and their Valkyrie unit won’t be far either. I know you’re concerned.” Cassian ran a hand through long curls as he spoke, his true anxiety on full display. 

“I’m concerned too, but we are at a stalemate. My job is to fix Illyria, to make her something that all three of us can truly be proud of. A place we work with, not just order around when we need them.” Cassian met Azriel’s shadowed stare before he locked eyes with his High Lord’s piercing violet gaze as he said his last piece. “Let me do my job Rhys, let me help Illyria.” 

Continue reading on AO3.

[acotarxreader]

The Art of You

Cassian x Reader

Synopsis: Cassian found recovery in the art that he created while preparing to apply to art school in New York, his greatest muse being his high-flying down-to-earth socialite girlfriend, you.

Warning; Fluff and modern

A/N: A little Cass fic dedicated to absolutely wonderfully kind and ever-lovely Cassian Queen @sarawritestories on her birthday. Happy (early) Birthday Friend Xx

----------------------------------------------------------

“YNN, can you just please stop fidgeting” 

“I’m so boreeeeeeeed Cass” You whined out, your voice echoing around Azriel and Rhysand’s apartment before you fixed your posture to sit straight once again on the stool. 

“Well, blame Az, it's not my fault someone ate my bowl of fruit” Azriel rolled his eyes from the dining room chair he rocked back and forth, chucking the core of an apple into a cerulean bowl. Cassian fired a piece of charcoal directly into his best friend's eye as he winked at him A howl left Azriel, immediately gaining a laugh from the both of you. Cassian quickly took a picture of his two best friends and their merriment.

“It'll be easier to draw from a reference who doesn't have the bladder of a Chihuahua” You glared playfully at his words and he took another picture.

“Well, I gotta go anyway Cass, my lovely Aunt will be wondering where I am” You slipped from the chair and into your jacket, Cassian's face sinking. 

“How will she react when she hears you’re in love with a starving artist and his soul-searching friends, ruining the image of a socialite” Azriel spoke playfully, trying to lighten the tension from you with having to return to your hectic household. 

“I didn’t know you had a soul Az” you teased, buttoning up your coat, ready to face the bone-chilling gales of New York in the Winter.

“Rhy’s dad bought him one” 

“Don’t be jealous Cass, you could have moved in with us but no, you chose the damp and rot of that hole you call home” Azriel laughed out to Cassian's toying, Cassian promptly firing more charcoal his way. 

“I’m sure she’d love if I social climbed my way to someone like Rhysand”

“Ouch” Rhysand emerged from the bathroom, waist swaddled in a thick fluffy towel, still damp from his shower. You had met Rhysand many years ago through various social functions your Aunt and Uncle dragged you to. The both of you quickly form an alliance of mischief at the events to keep yourselves from boredom. Cassian and Azriel came into your life once Rhysand had finally moved home to New York bringing them along for the fun. Their friendship spanning countless years of Summer camps together from which you had heard such grand stories, you all quickly became fast friends shortly after their arrival. 

“Yeah tell her it's the heir to a fortune you’re in love with and not the unemployed artist, what both of your families have groomed you for for years” 

“Gross” both you and Rhysand replied in unison

“Az, I’m not unemployed, I’m retired from active military duty. I’m just on leave while I recover and they figure out what to do with me” Cassian rolled his eyes for the millionth time, gathering the creative supplies that had helped him through his toughest months since returning from his time in service. 

“Retired like an old man” He nudged you gently while you smirked at him. 

“If it’s just leave then why are you applying for art school here?” Rhysand shot from his bedroom door, a raised eyebrow.

“Because-because-”

“-Because he’s great at it, Feyre is gonna try to get his art into the gallery she’s managing”

“Ah nepotism”

“Rhys, y’know what they say about those in glass houses” The group laughed towards the former military man as he reached your side smiling, forever happy you always knew what to say to defend him and his decisions. 

“Right kids, I gotta go” You pecked Cassian's cheek, your two other best friends groaning at the sight.

—---------------------------------------

The following night you found yourself waiting outside the rusting entrance to Cassian's apartment, many many many subway stops from where you, Rhysand and Azriel’s playground was. You wrapped your thick designer coat tighter around you fighting off the cold while waiting for Cassian to buzz you into his humble home. You subconsciously placed your car key between your fingers, ready to use it at any moment to defend yourself in the dilapidating area. The sound of the cage humming to release from its locks in front of you filled you instantly with relief, you pulled it to access the entrance to the block of apartments stairway. 

Cassian stole the cold away from you in his usual all-encompassing hug. He promptly took your coat for you as you sat down on the tattered couch. The apartment in its completeness was probably the size of Rhysand and Azriel’s sitting room alone. The oven could practically be reached from the couch but there was still room for Cassian's extensive video collection and a small table for two. Adjacent to the kitchen was the tiny bathroom and the entrance to his bedroom, the double bed nearly touching all four walls, a nest of cushioning you frequented. 

“Why don’t you ever use that closest?” You quizzed as Cassian draped your coat along the back of the dining room chair. Cassian stiffened for a moment before turning back to you with a shrug. 

“Emm that’s where I keep the dead bodies” you chuckled at him, he returned the smile. He dragged the second chair to land across from you where he sat and began to sketch, another one of your evenings to be spent with Cassian practising his portrait work. 

“Are you going to allow me to see this one?”

“My love, you know that’s not how this operation works” You sighed, knowing you should have anticipated his reply, he never let you see any of the works where you were the subject. 

“How come I’ve never seen the inside of that closet?” you gestured with your chin to the door behind him. 

“How come I’ve never met your aunt and uncle? Hm? We’ve been together almost a year”

“Touche-” You laughed “-they’re terrible people, Cass, they don’t deserve to meet you”

“Even still, maybe Az is right and you should tell them it's Rhysand that keeps you away from them so much”

“I’d rather swim up the Hudson in January” You smiled away at the growing sad tone in his voice, his smile growing across his face as he lowered his gaze back to the pad of paper, exhaling loudly in frustration. By 11 pm Cassian had gone through countless sheets of thick paper and abandoned all of the versions of you without allowing you so much as a glance. 

“Right, I need coffee” he stood, tossing the closed pad to the floor. 

“I’m gonna grab one of your sweatshirts, it's so cold in here” You could almost see Cassian's breath as he laughed at you. He made his way into the bathroom as you returned to the couch, wrapping the long sleeves in balls in your hand, attempting to trap what heat you could. 

“My love, can you throw me in a hand towel please” 

“Yeah where are they?” you called back to him through the closed door.

“In the closest by the- WAIT ACTUALLY I’LL GET IT MYSELF” His shouts came too slowly for you, the ounce of permission you had waited for for so long allowed you to finally pull the door of the hall closet open. Cassian dashed from the bathroom, his wet hand reaching for the door as you opened it but not quickly enough, a loud whoosh filled the apartment with sheets and sheets of paper, it tumbling out like a tsunami. Reams and reams of endless amounts of art washed over the two of you flooding the ground of the apartment. 

“Gods! You’re a hoarder! My boyfriend is a hoarder! I’m going to end up on the news after they dig us out of this!” You laughed lightly, Cassian stepping out of the almost ankle-high amount of his secret to stand between you and the door, your chests almost touching. 

“You don't need to see in there, it's all rough drafts of sketches that never came to be...it's all waste paper….” You raised an eyebrow before stepping back from him, looking down at the vast amount of sketches at your feet. Cassian dipped down quickly, attempting to pull back the drawings before you could properly examine them. It was too late, you had seen the vast amount of countless drawings, sketches, etches of you and your friends. Paint, chalk, pastels, pencil, watercolour, you name it and there were half finished creations everywhere.

“Are thes- are these me?” You just collected a random sample from your feet, Cassian seeming immediately ashamed taking them from you only to have you quickly replace them with others.

“They're not done...none of them are, I can't quite get you no matter what I do...you must think I'm crazy” You were almost too busy looking at the intricate details to hear him. You separated your eyes from the pages to focus on the walls of the closet. They too were covered with pages but also pictures. Pictures of you and your friends, you on your own, you and him. You traced your fingers across a few of them with Cassian’s eyes fixed on your every movement for any sign of negative expression. Instead you just seemed amazed at the sheer quantity and quality. You stepped around him to reach for a photo of the two of you, you both making goofy faces at the camera, a memory from your attempt to ride a tandem bike through Central Park. You laughed lightly at the photo, your hand tracing over your elbow beneath the fabric where the scar from the stitches after the fall from said bike still remained. 

“My love, please say something, I might be sick if you don't"

“I love them Cass, I mean you might want to try to draw a few objects for the portfolio as well as portraits but still, wow” you laughed, pulling the photo down from the wall, the bluetac taking some paint with it.

“This was a great day, trip to the ED aside...you should draw this”

“I don't know YNN, I've never done a self portrait and-”

“-Then I'll draw you and you can draw me? Please?” He couldn't say no to you, rolling his eyes before searching for materials.

“Are you sure you have paper?” You teased as he pushed the hoards of drawings back into their cage. 

“Shut up” he laughed in reply, retrieving a large fresh drawing pad of paper and pencils.

-

The two of you hovered over the shared piece of A2 paper sprawled across the width of the dining table, both quickly learning to draw around one another with impressive fluidity. Cassian stood behind you, one arm to support himself on one side of you, the other sketching alongside your hand. By 2 am the joint eclectic masterpiece of mixed personal styles was coming to fruition, both of you happy to spend the time together in the comfortable homily silence neither of you could find with anyone else other than one another.  

“Why don’t you draw more, my love?” the first time either of you had spoken since starting, his warm words sending electric shivers down the back of your neck.

“I don't really know, I guess I stopped liking the solitary aspect of it...I much prefer this” he agreed and you both continued at the masterpiece until it finally felt as whole as you made one another feel. You both stood back to admire the medley of lines, the drawing was not as perfect or susynced as if one artist had done it but it was yours and that made up for any mismatches in theme. 

“It’s perfect”

“Just like one of the artists who made it” he beamed down to you as you folded yourself into his embrace, a tender kiss landing on the top of your head. 

“Art school isn’t ready for a talent like you” You reached to kiss him gently. 

“When I’m a famous artist, I’ll be worthy enough to meet your family” You groaned into his chest before pulling back again.

“Cass, you’re worthy of all of me now but they are not worthy of you. Once I’ve aged into the trust my parents left me they’re going to be so far gone from my world it won’t matter their opinion on anything in my life”

“So their opinion matters in your life now?” you groan again before laughing at his grinning face. 

“If I’m lucky once they find out you’re a hoarder that’ll kill them off” You smirked down to the remaining few paper stragglers on the floor. Your eyes landed back on the masterpiece you had both created together. 

“To spend a lifetime trying to be worthy of you my love would be a lifetime well spent” 

------------------------------------------------

Whatcha think?

[cigarettesandinevitablebetrayal]

Cigs' Playlist Prompts

Special prompt set I've been meaning to do. All of these lyrics are pulled from songs off the character playlists I've made. Inbox me one that interests you and I'll freewrite at least 1k words based on the characters I associate with it. Bonus 1k added if you wanna guess whether it's for Rashad, Remus, Seongwon, Mateo, Corin, Cassian, or Miro - correct or not (there's 4 per character - none for Loren or Alek, tragically, as they're too new).

Turnaround will be a bit, so feel free to come off anon, if you'd like to be notified. Prompts below:

I should have told you from the start // That I've got glue inside my heart // I'll stick with you until it's final beat - Weird by Elliot Lee

You read it wrong // A bold faced fever // You've stolen everything you believe - Cairo by San Fermin

Tonight you'll make your toast // Oh, to better days when all had seemed so right // I hear your heartbeat thumping // Screaming, "Honey, don't let me go" // I know you want to stay // But I'm already gone - Love Murder One by Coheed & Cambria

Get the fuck off my stage, I'm the Sandman // Get the fuck off my dick, that ain't right // I make a play fuckin' up your whole life - HUMBLE. by Kendrick Lamar

And in the wreck of all we burnt // Stands a piano like a wound // I play our song to see if it's in tune - Ruin by The Amazing Devil

All I see is red all around me // My chest was tight like I'm drowning // When I sleep, my thoughts are like lightning // When I breathe, it feels so exhausting // Like I'm incomplete; slowly falling - Starlight by Akera Sky

But the teeth come out when the camera flashes // We said we'd always be the same // But we lost each other in the game - LA Hallucinations by Carly Rae Jepsen

They tell me I'm hellbent on revenge // I cut my teeth on weaker men // I won't apologize again - Good Girls by Chvrches

They sent your heroes to the guillotine // And now they're loading up their magazines // Misinformation is a beauty queen - Guillotine by Barns Courtney

I needed revolution // I never had a war in mind // And now the river runs dry and the fall is deep // The truth is dark and it makes us bleed - Don't Pray for Me by Within Temptation

It's the thinnest line // They hung you out by // You were holding my hands and saying // What if I only ever took what's mine? - Steal by Maribou State

Sometimes it feels like we're frozen in time // Floating in space, lines undefined // We can't free ourselves from chains // Our love forever changed - Reveal by Rabbit Junk

Mass destruction and mass corruption // The souls of suffering men // Clutching on deaf ears again // Rapture is coming // it's all prophecy and // If I gotta be sacrificed for the greater good // Then that's what it gotta be - Pray for Me by The Weeknd and Kendrick Lamar

But if you let me be your skyline // I'll let you be the wave // That reduces me to rubble // but looked safe from far away - The Ghosts of Beverly Drive by Death Cab for Cutie

I ain't never scared and I ain't never horrified // I just look down at my Rolex, it said it's the darkest times // I ain't never terrified, I ain't never petrified // You know I see dead people, I just tell 'em, "Get a life" - Scared of the Dark by Lil Wayne, Ty Dolla $ign, and XXXTENTACION

She's been watching for a century // With hatred and with scorn // If you know the hunter's coming // Then you hide or keep on running // 'Cause she's slain the gods before - Godhunter by Aviators

Tell me who's stopping this // Then I'm dropping the bitches that's gon' top your list // All 'em talking, they sitting, just popping shit // Use to listen but, bitch, I am auditing - Who's Better? by DaddyPhatSnaps

Dragged further away from the shore // And deeper into the drink // Rotting like a wreck on the ocean floor // Sinking like a siren that can't swim anymore - Swimming by Florence + the Machine

Cover me in all your platinum // I'm wanting how they look at you // I'm tired of feeling numb - No Problems by ONICKS

Who will burn who // As I catch you // Burning through seven nights // When not all is right - The Viles by Blaqk Audio

And I walk // And I walk // Knowing every last one of them is painted in light // As I make myself acquainted with the saint of never getting it right - Blossoms by The Amazing Devil

No moments alone // No moments to share // In search of a key // You know is not there - Loreley by Lord of the Lost

People are fuel // Everybody burns // Just a little push and maybe some will learn // What a life is like // What it's like to burn - Cover My Traces by Reach

Well I drank, sipped, sucked it up // Threw every last shred of hope in the cup // Then knocked it back // World fades to black // Not quenched until I drown - Delirium Tremendous by Felix Hagan & the Family

There's only two ways to make it in this town // One is to be brilliant // The other is to drown - Neon Medusa by The Midnight

You're in the walls that I made with crosses and frames // Hanging upside down // For granted, in vain, I took everything // I ever cared about - The Death of Peace of Mind by Bad Omens

And how does it feel now // You've scratched that itch? // You've pulled out all your stitches // Hubris is a bitch - 100 Years by Florence + the Machine

Somewhere on the road you changed // Shot down by the life you chose // A losing game // And now that you're on the ride // Mirror, mirror, please don't watch me cut my ties - Catch Me If You Can by The Scarlet Opera

[mashithamel]

A Court of Mist and Fury: Sarah J Maas

Time for “A Court of Mist and Fury” thread (originally on BlueSky)! I am prepared to move on from Tamlin…I think.

* “For him, I had done this—for him, I’d gladly wrecked myself and my immortal soul. And now I had eternity to live with it.” I can see how a relationship after those trials would struggle.

* “You are—you’re everything to me,” he said thickly. “I need … I need you to be all right. To know they can’t get to you—can’t hurt you anymore.” —Tamlin. Yeah, I can see this smothering form of love going badly. ☹️

* Well. That was not a good wedding. 🫣

* “Perhaps I should explain everything when I returned.” Yes, listen to Lucien and actually talk to each other. Or, you know, break up and mate the Night Court guy. Whichever is easier.

* I want to be friends with Morrigan. I wonder how well statement this will age?

* To be fair, Feyre probably learns best under pressure/duress (like hunting). If only just to prove that she can. Rysand isn’t completely wrong here. Don’t take this to mean I support Tamlin slander, though.

* Yeah, Tamlin really should have been including her in strategy and information mtgs, even if he wasn’t going to let her go do things. Gotta give her something useful to do.

* “But I know you—more than you realize, I think—and I don’t believe for one damn minute that you’re remotely fine with being a pretty trophy for someone who sat on his ass for nearly fifty years, then sat on his ass while you were shredded apart—” ~ Rysand ……fair point

* I’m sorry, “winnowing” is a tesseract, or a wrinkle in time, described exactly the same way. Oooo, is this in the same universe? Head cannon!#IsMsWhatsitAFae

* “Training would draw too much attention,” Tamlin said. “You don’t need to train. I can guard you from whatever comes our way.” ….*sigh* not helping, Tamlin.

* “He was trying. We were trying. I wouldn’t jeopardize that.” ~ Feyre. I mean, you can’t say they aren’t trying. Ugh, terrible to see what could be something good just die a terrible death of good intentions.

* “I was trapped inside this house. I might as well have been Under the Mountain; I might as well have been inside that cell again—“. Well, it was fun for a while Tamlin, but yeah, that’s a relationship ender 😢

* “If you come with me, there is no going back. You will not be allowed to speak of what you see to anyone outside of my court. Because if you do, people will die—my people will die.“ ~Rysand. Not only willing to let her accept the risks but willing to trust her enough to risk his people? That’s hot.

* “Rhys slid his hands into his pockets.” I like this quirk/trademark move of his. He’s so confident he can put his hands away and appear to not be a threat. Or at least that‘s what he wants you to think.

* “Large, warm hands pulled my hair back a moment later.” He holds her hair back while she pukes, and it’s sweet. Yeah, yeah, Rhys is a better boyfriend.

* For someone who barters hard for information the Bone Carver is pretty free with the exposition. Fortunately for the reader.

* If the last book was based on fairy tales, this one pulls from my childhood favorites. The Black Cauldron (Lloyd Alexander, The Prydain Chronicles) is my favorite in that beautifully written fantasy series. I should reread it after this 📖

* And the Weaver is giving me Marshes of Morva vibes!

* “And as she moved, Nesta angled herself—ever so slightly. Between me and Elain.” “Cassian was sizing up Nesta, a gleam in his eyes that I could only interpret as a warrior finding himself faced with a new, interesting opponent. Then, Mother above, Nesta shifted her attention to Cassian, noticing that gleam—what it meant. She snarled softly, “What are you looking at?” Yep, still liking Nesta. I get Nynaeve vibes.

* I’m…I’m not a big fan of Feyre. Maybe because I’m a petty person? I don’t want to belittle her trauma or everything she’s come through. Just, at 14 everyone in her life was incompentent and hateful/stupid, she was the only good one. Which is fine if this is Cinderella and her evil stepsisters, but if we’re going to get in on Nesta’s inner workings later, and we seem to want her to be at least a somewhat sympathetic character, was there more to it we learn later? Or will it always be Feyre deserves everything good and everyone else is just petty and jealous? Maybe it’s the first person narrative, where we’re only in Feyre’s head, she’s dealing with a lot of trauma. I’m just not sure whether she’s meant to be a reliable narrator (which seems to be the case) or if her interpretation of things can be taken with a grain of salt that we’ll learn about later.

* “Amren didn’t touch her plate, though she pushed things around as she always did. I wondered what—who—she’d eat while here. Varian seemed like a good guess.” Heh.

* Amren is a dragon, right? I’ll place my bets on that.

* “I heard what you told him,” he said. “That you thought it would be easy to fall in love with him. You meant it too.” “So?” It was the only thing I could think of to say. “I was jealous—of that. That I’m not…that sort of person. For anyone.” 🥺

* “Now the thought of endless warmth and sun made me … bored.” …it’s been three days Feyre. Maybe stop putting your nose in the air and you might learn to appreciate something that isn’t Night Court, hmm?

* Rysand, keeping Amren in the dark about some part of your plan, even if it’s a big maybe, just seems like a royally stupid idea. You can keep up appearances of being the smart one without keeping your inner circle in the dark.

* And it’s not like her hopes aren’t getting up anyway, right now, while waiting for the second half of the Book. 🤷🏼‍♀️

* I love their notes to each other, and how Rhys gets a kick out of her.

* If Varian honestly thinks he has a chance with Amren I am super intrigued and would like to see more of him, please.

* And it was Nesta who hissed from behind us, “We have servants here. With families. There are children in these lands. And you mean to leave us all in the hands of the Fae?” The eldest one’s face softened. “It is no easy choice, girl—” “It is the choice of cowards,” Nesta snapped. I ❤️ Nesta

* “And I understood—why Rhys could not endure Nesta for more than a few moments, why he could not let go of that anger where her failings were concerned, even if I had.” What? Where is this coming from? Autumn Court, lesser fae discrimination, directly to Nesta hate? Leave my girl out of it!

* “And if any of you lay a hand on her, you lose that hand. And then you lose your head.” I tried not to shiver, as Cassian and Mor showed no reaction at all. “And once Feyre is done killing you,” Rhys smirked, “then I’ll gring your bones to dust.” Ok, I love how he sets her up as more than able to protect herself here.

* “The people he’d loved most—gone. Slaughtered in cold blood. Slaughtered by Tamlin.” ….ouch. Maybe it’s time for some Tamlin slander after all?

* Only one bed trope 😆

* And it’s so cold they’ll have to use body heat to stay warm 😆

* “You think I liked hearing you wanted me only for amusement and release? You think it didn’t drive me out of my mind so completely that those bastards shot me out of the sky because I was too busy wondering if I should just tell you, or wait—or maybe take whatever pieces that you offered me and be happy with it?” I mean, I hate when guys assume for women without giving them the info to make their own educated choices, but it kinda sounds like he was trying to, you know, actually let you make your own choices? Come to your own decision before “trapping” you with what you might see as an obligation?

* And then instead of letting Mor find out if Rhys was ok she demands to be taken somewhere to pout? I’m unimpressed, Feyre. 😠

* “I’d walked away from him—a day after I’d told him he was the only thing I’d never walk away from. I’d demanded honesty, and at the first true test, I hadn’t even let him give it to me. I hadn’t granted him the consideration of hearing him out.” Good, good…feel the guilt, Feyre.

* “I broke into Clare’s head when they brought her Under the Mountain. I took away her pain, and told her to scream when expected to.“ Oh thank goodness.

* “Rhys was silent—we all were. Until Nesta said too softly, “This is the talk of madwomen. Of arrogant, stupid fools.” How many books until I get Nesta POV???? I love her.

* I could put just about every Nesta line from this book on here, but then I’d probably get banned for copyright infringement.

* We didn’t even learn the golden queen’s name 👑

* Ok. Tamlin slander it is.

* “Tamlin launched himself at the throne, as if he’d rip him to shreds.” Ooookay. Good for him for, you know, having some guts! Interesting that he’s so motivated by risk to Feyre’s sisters?

* “Nesta fought every step of the way.” That’s my girl!

* There is way too much vomiting in this book.

* Oh. Oh. I get it. The whole first book, everything in this one. I get it. Dang, my patient told me the second one in particular would get me, and it did. Wow.

Bottom line: I’m having feelings. I’m shipping Nesta/Cassian and I need to know what’s happening to her. I am holding my breath for Lucien to be awesome. There’s probably an 8 week hold on the next book… (Actually, it’s 6 weeks 😭)

[jynrso]

not without me / not without you

.....hi everyone!! it's been a full year since i've written anything but lately i've been in a rebelcaptain mood (honestly i have to thank rifle for this, their fics are amazing and have definitely inspired me to write) and thought i'd whip something small up!

this is self-indulgent and fun, and i've got a few other oneshots i'm working on, so i hope you enjoy!

read it on ao3!

“Whoever does it first wins, then.”

Baze reaches out to shake Jyn’s hand gruffly, nodding. “It’s a bet.”

“What’s a bet?”

She spins around at the sound of Cassian’s voice, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. Ignoring the way her stomach flips at the sight of him  –– not that she'll ever tell him but he looks unfairly good in that blue parka of his –– she quickly attends to redirect the flow of the conversation, despite knowing her efforts are likely futile. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be in a briefing right now?” she asks suspiciously, raising an eyebrow. 

“Got out early,” he replies breezily, not letting her off the hook. “What’s this about a bet?”  

Baze shifts behind her, expressive neutrally impenetrable. She once again ignores his question entirely; even without his Intelligence training, he knows her far too well for her to be able to lie convincingly to him. “We’re just getting ready to head out.”

He narrows his eyes at her. A beat of scrutinization later, he turns to Bodhi, understanding from past experience that she won’t say a word unless she wants to. “What were they talking about?”

Bodhi opens his mouth, then sends a furtive glance at Jyn. She shakes her head, widening her eyes slightly. They both know there’s no way in hell that Cassian would be okay with the bet. Considering how much Bodhi worries too much about her and Baze’s safety when making impulsive decisions like this one, she’s begrudgingly impressed he’s managed to go this long without saying anything. 

“They were–well, they–”

She grabs Bodhi’s arm before he can spill, and starts dragging him toward his tauntaun. “We don’t have any time to chat,” she calls over her shoulder. “We really need to go check the borders. You know how it is. Lots of Imperial drones floating around these days.”

Baze grunts in agreement, hoisting himself up on his tauntaun. Jyn pushes Bodhi toward his animal before making her way to her own. Cassian stops her before she can. “Jyn, wait. Please tell me you aren’t doing something stupid.”

“When have I ever done something stupid?”

He opens his mouth to respond almost immediately, but she cuts him off, already knowing his answer. “Don’t answer that. We’ll be fine, Cassian. Don’t worry.”

His mouth evens out into a tight line. “I always worry,” he mutters but lets her go. With one foot in the stirrup already, she mounts her tauntaun with ease. “Please be careful.”

“I’m always careful,” she tells him cheekily. In response, he looks at her flatly, not having to say anything, and she rolls her eyes, digging her heels into the side of the tauntaun. It rears up, then starts forward, with Baze at her side and Bodhi trailing behind them. She winks and calls behind her with a wave, “See you in a couple hours!”

--------

“Cassian is going to kill us,” Jyn groans, leaning her head back against the icy wall and closing her eyes. The cold seeps up through the floor and through her thick layers, but she can’t find the energy to stand, not with the way her whole body aches in protest every time she moves. 

“Cassian is going to kill you, little sister,” Baze mumbles from somewhere to her left, slumped in a similar position. “Maybe Bodhi, too. But Chirrut is going to kill me.”

“Nobody’s dying out here,” Bodhi intejects, then adds quickly, “ –– And no one’s getting killed, either.” Jyn cracks open an eye, lazily watching him hover over the two of them. “The tauntauns had all of out medical supplies. And they ran in the–the attack. But. . .” he wrings his hands. “We’re fine. I’m just gotta. . .”

“Don’t you dare comm anyone,” she snaps, trying to lean forward to snatch the device out of his hand, but the movement shoots agony through her side. Still, she persists, her pride winning out over her well-being. (It’s really not that bad.) “Fuck– fuck. Don’t–”

“I don’t want you bleeding out in some cave!” he retorts, worry flashing in his eyes. “Your side, is it. . .?”

“It’s fine,” she grunts, shifting slightly. Thanks to the cold, the bleeding on her side and hip has slowed to a sluggish pace. Pointedly not looking at the pool of red underneath where she sits, she raises her chin definitely and reasserts, “I’m fine, Bodhi.”

“I’m fine too, if anyone’s wondering,” Baze says with a grunt. When she turns toward him, he’s trying to stand, but his movements are shaky. He, too, hadn’t come out of this unscathed; almost as soon as she’d charged the beast, he’d been quick to follow with his repeater cannon. Somewhere in the middle of the fight, he’d gotten knocked back, landing hard against the cave wall.  

“I’m pretty sure you–you have a concussion,” Bodhi says, leveling him with a stare that sends him back to the ground. “I’ll calling Cassian. We need an medical evac.”

As Bodhi busies himself with the comm, Jyn turns to Baze. “So does this mean that Bodhi won the bet?”

Baze shakes his head. “Bodhi was never apart of the bet. It’s still on.”

“Good.”

“No, I, uh, I’m pretty sure I won,” Bodhi interrupts, raising his head to look at them. “I was the first one to kill a wampa so—I won the bet.”

“Dumb luck,” Baze grunts.

“I shot it!”

“You emptied your entire clip into its head after we wore it down for you,” Jyn informs him with a raised eyebrow. “There was no way you could have missed. Besides, you never shook on it.”

Bodhi rolls his eyes, turning away from them and fiddling with the device in his hands. “You two are just jealous that I–Cassian!”

The voice on the comm fades in and out before Cassian's voice comes out clearly, asking, “Bodhi? What’s wrong?”

“Um, we need a medical evac. Jyn and Baze–”

“We’re fine, Cassian,” she cuts in, struggling to push up against the wall and get over to where Bodhi is sitting, but she’s not able to keep the strain out of her voice as she moves. “Don’t worry about us.”

“Jyn? What happened?”

“We’re just. . .” she falters, glances around. The pain makes her sloppy, dredging the depths of her brain for a possible excuse she’d normally have at the ready. “We’re taking a quick break. It’s colder than we thought.”

“The bet was to see who could kill a wampa first,” Bodhi says loudly, speaking over her protests. “So–they both charged it as soon as they found one.”

“We did not charge it,” Jyn hisses.

“You charged it,” Baze tells her. “I only followed.”

“Don’t try–”

Cassian mutters a string of curses under his breath. “I’ll get a team assembed and head out as soon as I can. Send me your coordinates. And Bodhi –– don’t let them move.”

“I’ll do my best,” Bodhi promises, shooting a look at the two of them. “See you soon, Cassian.”

They’re silent for a few moments, the only sound is the wind whistling outside of the cave before Jyn announces, feeling a bit like she’s facing down an Imperial firing squad, “Well. We’re fucked.”

--------

 “Bodhi? Are you there?”

Bodhi scrambles to his feet at the sound of Cassian’s voice at the mouth of the cave. “Yeah! Yeah, we’re all here. Alive.”

Cassian ducks into the cave with a medic at his back, and strides ahead of them. His expression is pinched with worry. At the sight of the two of them propped up against the wall, he rushes to her side, eyes immediately going to the pool of blood underneath her. “Where are you hurt?"

“I’m fine,” she says on instinct as he cups her face, searching her eyes for any pain. His thumb unconsciously strokes a few lines against her cheek, his touch warming her skin even through his gloves. “My side is just a little. . .banged up.”

"Jyn. . ." 

"I'm not lying," she insists but he says nothing. All he can do is stare down at the wound on her side, the lines on his face growing tighter and tighter with worry as the medic begins to cut away part of her clothing to expose her injury. 

He leans in closer, trying to see over her at what the medic's doing. As he does so, the fur of his parka hood brushes against her skin. "Jyn," he says again. "I distinctly recall asking you to be careful.”

“I was careful,” she stresses. Cassian shifts to the side but remains crouched next to her. Combined with the cold, the position must be hell on his back and leg, but he doesn’t move to get up; however, when she turns to tell him that he doesn't need to be so close, the medic pokes at her side hard enough that she flinches, the words dying on her tongue. 

In response to her wince, Cassian reaches for her hand, squeezing it gently. Her wound really isn’t that bad and she really doesn't need him to hold her hand. . . but she doesn’t tell him that. Instead, she squeezes back in what she hopes is a reassuring manner, sinking into the small amount of comfort it provides her. 

“What happened?” he asks tersely, perhaps in an attempt to distract her from the pain as the medic stabilizes her injury enough so it doesn’t worsen on the return to base. 

Ever since Bodhi had called him, she’d been planning on what to say. Before she can even start, though, Bodhi cuts her off. 

“She hopped off her tauntaun without a weapon and charged the wampa,” Bodhi snaps. “Then Baze –– their bet to see who could kill one first––” 

Jyn widens her eyes, her jaw dropping in shock at the uncharacteristic outburst. Bodhi blinks, looking as surprised as her to have said that out loud, then backtracks, perhaps to apologize. “I–”

“No, you’re right, Bodhi,” Cassian says, looking down at where she’s sitting. There’s a crease between his eyebrows that she wants to rub away with her thumb. “Neither of them were careful.”

She sighs heavily, hitting her head against the wall. Baze grunts next to her but keeps silent. The medic stands at her side, breaking the silence that follows. “Sergeant Erso is stable enough to be moved, sir.”

Cassian nods. “Thank you.”

With that, he bends down to sweep her into his arms bridal style. Jyn’s eyes widen, an undignified noise coming out of her mouth before she covers it with a spitted curse. “Cassian––”

“You lost your walking privileges when you charged a wampa,” he mutters, curling her tighter to his chest as he carries her outside the cave. His bad leg drags behind him slightly, making his gait uneven, but he makes no move to set her down. Behind them, the medic assists Baze to his feet, keeping a firm hold on his arm when he mutters something about being able to walk on his own.

She grumbles under her breath but when they emerge from the cave and step out into the biting cold, she buries her face into his coat to hide from the wind. 

He sighs, hitching her up in his arms further. “You can’t be making foolish bets like this, Jyn. Not when you’re risking your life unnecessarily.”

Unable to let it go entirely, she argues weakly, “The bet wasn’t foolish –”

“Yes, it was.”

Cassian’s firm response makes her pause. After a beat of contemplation, she exhales, knowing he’s right; it’s an odd feeling, having someone care about her this much. It isn’t something she’s used to. Navigating these sorts of conversations is like walking blind through a minefield. 

“Okay, fine,” she agrees reluctantly. Remembering the look on his face when he’d rushed into the cave, she adds, “I . . . didn’t mean to worry you.” 

“Just don’t do it again,” he tells her. “No more bets like this.”

"Fine," she says, the pain in her side draining her energy to argue. "No more bets." 

(Since he’s said nothing about it, she assumes that friendly competitions are fine, but doesn’t push the matter any further.)

"I'm glad you're safe," he murmurs, so quiet she barely hears it over the whistling wind. “You’re not allowed to die, you hear me?” 

Not without me goes unspoken.

Even though her injury hadn't been life-threatening, it could have been so much worse and he hadn't been there with her. He doesn't have to say it, it's clear in his face –– Bodhi's call had scared him. On the beach, she'd been prepared to die in his arms. Now, she can't stand the thought of them being apart when it inevitably happens. 

Instead, she reaches up and grips the label of his jacket. When he looks down, she meets his gaze evenly. "You aren't either."

Not without you goes unspoken.